Cruising for Love or is it seasickness?
by RRatedauthor
Summary: John Cena is spending a semester at sea.  Will he be able to cope or is life aboard ship too much?
1. Chapter 1

Twenty-two-year-old John Cena stood at the departure terminal, with his suitcase in his hand and a forced smile on his face while he said goodbye to his parents. What had seemed like a good idea to assert his freedom was starting to seem more like a really rash decision. John junior had signed up for what was advertised as a "semester at sea". Taking place on board a refitted cruise liner, it combined world travel and exposure to foreign lands with normal schooling.

"Remember son, if you need anything, you know where to find us." John senior looked around the crowded lounge. "Just not in here."

A camera crew rushed past, intently following six students. People parted instantly to allow them to pass, but this only added to the confusion.

"What the hell?" John's mother seldom used strong language, even words like hell, unless she was under a lot of stress and seeing her son off like this was definitely stressful. The stress was increasing rapidly and one of the camera people bumping into her was no help at all.

"Easy Carol. I'm sure there's some reason for it." Cena senior looked around, but the crew was already swallowed up in the sea of students.

The ship's horn sounded.

"Better go son. You don't want to miss your boat." John's mom pecked her son on the cheek, holding back her tears at the upcoming separation.

"Take care of yourself and we'll see you at Christmas." John senior held his own emotions back, except for a nervous gulp.

A quick hug to both of them and John junior quickly joined the group preparing to board. If he had stayed any longer, the butterflies in his stomach were going to cause more problems than just missing the first part of his junior year at college.

Rather than go up on deck to wave goodbye, John sought out his room. He knew that if he even thought he saw his parents waving to him, he was not going to remain on the ship for long.

"Four-sixteen... four-sixteen... four-sixteen." He muttered over and over again. Since this was supposed to be an educational environment, and not spring break in Panama City beach, the ship's accommodations were divided into what the brochure called "male and female dormitories". Two to a room, just like it would have been had John been in college on dry land.

"Here we are."

Two beds, two desks, two closets, and that was pretty much it. It was furnished only slightly more than photos John had seen of the rooms in steerage on the Titanic. (And no, there was no in-room plumbing, either.)

"Home sweet home." John sighed, tossing his two suitcases on the bed. The other side of the room was still vacant. No surprise there. John correctly assumed that everyone else was still above decks waving to the crowds.

John sighed again. Looking around the room, he already felt a twinge of homesickness and the ship hadn't even pulled away from the dock. Seconds later, any chance of backing out was gone when he heard three short blasts from the ship's horn: the equivalent of the 'all ashore that's going ashore' cries of early days. This meant that anyone who wasn't sailing should be either off the ship or close to it and if you weren't on, you probably weren't getting on. Moments later, a deep rumbling came from the bowels of the ship as the huge engines started up.

"And we're off." John whispered, thankful that he still had some time to compose himself before his bunkmate arrived. Maybe he'd get really lucky and not have to share a room, but that was very unlikely considering that John only got his space because enough people backed out before the cutoff.

Hoping that maybe doing something like unpacking would ease his nerves, John opened the suitcase closest to him... and almost broke into tears on the spot. Atop his neatly-folded jean shorts was a brief note in his mother's handwriting. "A little something to remind you of home" and it was attached to Gary; the stuffed giraffe he'd had since he was three years old.

"Awww., mom..." John smiled. There had been a reason he had decided not to pack Gary.

The sound of the doorknob turning quickly sent Cena into panic mode as he tried to find a suitable hiding place for Gary. The only thing handy was the pillow and underneath it Gary went. A 22-year-old with a stuffed animal did not make real good first impressions.

"Thanks for your help, steward." The sound of money changing hands reached Cena's ears seconds before he saw his roommate for the first time. A little shorter than John, short dark hair which matched his dark eyes. What got Cena's attention wasn't his appearance, but the four large suitcases he brought with him. This guy did not seem to know the meaning of travel light.

"This sure ain't the Queen Mary." He mumbled "I wonder if I can upgrade..." He stopped in mid-thought when he noticed Cena. "I guess you beat me to it."

"I guess." John answered

Throwing his suitcases haphazardly into a corner, he plopped down on his bed and tested the mattress, staring at the ceiling for endless seconds. "I wonder if they'll let us paint?"

"Huh?"

"Y'know, paint? Some nice fluorescent pinks and greens... maybe lighten the place up a bit."

"I don't think that's allowed." John stated

"Probably not." Swinging his legs over the side, he regarded John thoughtfully. "I'm Tom Hardy, by the way."

"John Cena." John shook Tom's offered hand.

"Now that we're all buddy-buddy, I don't know else to say this, so I'm going to be blunt... your giraffe is showing."

"My what?" Cena immediately looked down at his groin, thinking that giraffe meant something else.

"Your giraffe." Tom repeated, pointing his thumb to the head of John's bed. Cena immediately turned deep red and tried to cover it up.

Tom scratched the back of his head. It looked like he was trying to hold back laughter. "Dude, by all rights I should rib the fuck out of you, but a hypocrite I am not."

Before Cena could decipher what Tom meant, the other man scrambled off the bed, grabbing one of the smaller bags of the four he'd packed. "I got a lizard."

John wasn't sure what to think until he saw Tom's lizard. Short and purple, with big white eyes, it made John feel a little less homesick and a lot less awkward. Still, and to what he hoped wasn't his totally doofusness, he reached for the giraffe in question and gave it a comforting squeeze.

"Bit homesick already, eh?" Tom set his own cuddle toy on the pillow, then started his unpacking. John watched, curiosity toward how Tom was going to get everything stored away overriding his politeness about not staring.

"A bit." John finally admitted. "This is gonna be my first time away from my family for this long."

"Don't sweat it, man. You'll have forgotten all about them by the time we hit Costa Rica in two weeks. Between school, and the sights, you'll be too busy." Tom took out several button-down shirts and hung them in the closet. "You need much closet space?"

"Nah." John thought about his own wardrobe. "Just leave me a hanger or two."

"Not a problem... like your accent, though. Somewhere in New England?" Tom quickly emptied suitcase one and moved on.

"Yeah. West Newbury, Mass." John answered

"Never heard of it." Tom answered "Small town?"

"About 4500. It's about 35 miles from Boston." John replied "You?"

"I wish I could say the same. I got kicked out of the house at 16 and moved to L.A." Tom shrugged "I belong to the city."

"Wow..." John gasped

"My parents were really fuckin' primitive. They didn't approve of my friends, hated the one serious relationship I was involved in, and told me that I wasn't applying myself. I stood up to them and got the boot. Went to UCLA for two years, then decided that I needed more freedom, so I tried this for a term and really enjoyed it." Tom replied "But I'm sure that's more than you wanted to know."

"How many times have you done this?"

"This will be my fourth time." Tom answered "I'll be 'graduating' at the end of this semester. Seriously, dude, you're gonna enjoy this. Trust me."

John answered "I'm just a little bit nervous, that's all, but I do."

"In that case, you should also trust me when I tell ya that if you're not gonna unpack right now, we should probably head to the orientation in the main dining salon. It's mandatory for all the noobs." Tom pocketed his keys.

"I know, dude. Don't worry about me."

Tom chuckled "Of all the roommates I've had, you're the first one I think could beat me in a fight, so I ain't worryin' about ya. But your gonna get paired up with someone, sorta like a buddy system. Usually it's people in a lot of the same classes, but I always think it helps to have a friend who knows the routines."

"You volunteering to be my friend?" John asked, deliberately sounding corny.

Tom burst into laughter. "Dude, you and I are gonna get along great. Let's hit orientation, then I can show you around the ship if you want." He playfully tagged John on the shoulder on his way out the door.

John followed, realizing that Tom was right. His homesickness was gone and he was, for the first time in a long time, looking forward to the future.

_Words from Riky:_

_I know where this is going, but I'm just not sure how I'm going to get there. Hopefully this does not turn into the Titanic and sink before it gets_ anywhere.

_Gary the Giraffe appears thanks to Megan... you rock!  
><em>


	2. Chapter 2

Tom was right. Having given up on reading the required Shakespeare for his literature class, John was staring at the ceiling when this nugget of knowledge slammed into his consciousness. It had been almost a week since sailing and other than a few tears on his pillow the first night, John hadn't had a whole lot of time to dwell on how much he missed his parents, his friends, and everything else he'd left behind.

"Making plans for Costa Rica already?" Tom asked from across the room where he was enjoying his trigonometry homework almost as much.

Cena continued to stare with glazed-eyes skyward.

"Earth to Cena?" Tom shouted. When even this failed to get his attention, he launched Lizard at him. With a soft thunk, he bounced off John's forehead, breaking him out of his trance.

"Huh... what?" John stared stupidly at the purple toy. "Did you say something?"

"Naw, I just felt like chucking Lizard at you... of course I did! I asked you if you were making plans for Costa Rica already?" Tom shook his head. "I didn't think muscle heads were that thick."

"I am not a muscle head!" John shouted, throwing Lizard toward his roommate's head. Tom caught it without even looking up from his textbook.

"You're not?" Tom cocked his head and looked at John with total disbelief. "You spend two hours a day in the gym, you gulp down protein shakes like water, and what did you say you were studying before coming on board?"

"Exercise physiology." John answered "But do most muscle heads go to college?"

"Football scholarships." Tom stated "Okay, maybe you're only a muscle head from the neck down... never mind; this conversation has gone off on a tangent. All I really wanted to know is..."

"Costa Rica... yeah, yeah. I did hear you the second time." Cena smirked "I dunno. How long are we docked?"

"It's on page one of your orientation package... or did you toss it in the first waste basket you saw after leaving like I did?" Tom stretched his back, grimacing slightly.

"Nah... I've been too busy with my workouts and my protein shakes." John replied

Tom chuckled. "The more I learn about you Cena, the less I am surprised." He rolled off his bed and grabbed his jacket. "We got a week of landfall."

"Cool. I know my girl was going to try to hook up with me, but I haven't heard a confirmation." John's eyes gleamed at the thought of seeing someone familiar.

"Just leave a sock on the door if you and... what's her name again?"

"Trish."

"If you and Trish decide to work on your Pythagorean theorem." Tom stated "I'll see you in a few."

John nodded, returning to his studies.

Tom stepped out into the corridor, closing the door behind him. He barely took three steps before he had to press against the bulkhead. Twin girls, totally oblivious to anything around them, were walking toward him. Even though they were both skinny as rails, they still managed to make it impossible for anyone else to move. Tom waited for them to pass, then flipped them both off before heading to the poker game he'd arranged between some members of his advanced accounting class.

"What an ass." Brie said. She'd seen his gesture reflected in her Blackberry's screen.

"Yeah, but he's cute." Nikki stated

"You think he's cute?" Brie scoffed

"Just because he said if you ate an olive you'd look pregnant doesn't mean I can't try my luck." Nikki flipped her hair out of her face, then reached for her compact.

"Whatever. Besides, have you seen his roommate?" Brie added "Total hunk of man-meat."

"Yeah. I hate to break it you, but he's got a girl." Nikki replied

"So." Brie answered "When has that ever stopped me?"

Nikki groaned. She could see that this was already going to be a long semester.

...

Two a.m. Since this was technically a school, all students were required to be back in their rooms no later than midnight or face possible disciplinary actions. That didn't deter the poker players. It was down to Tom, and two other guys named Mike Mizanin and John Morrison.

"Check, raise, or call." Morrison interjected, interrupting Mike's intense concentration. "Or are you waiting for these cards to play themselves?"

"Just a minute..." Mike, or "Miz" as he preferred to be called, looked at his cards one more time. "All-in."

"All-in?" Morrison repeated "You're so full of shit, that's why your eyes are brown."

"If I'm so full of it, then call me." Miz gloated

Morrison looked at his cards. "Unfortunately..."

"He's John Morrison and he can't beat shit." Tom chuckled "Toss 'em in before you end up having to wire home for more cash."

Morrison sighed. "Fuck." He whispered, tossing his cards down.

Tom laughed. "Now me, on the other hand... call. What do you have?"

"Full house... aces over kings! Take that, brainiac... I'm the Miz and I'm..."

"About to lose a lot of money." Tom stated "I got a pair of queens and another pair of queens and where I come from, that means you are now one broke little boy." He raked in the chips. "At the risk of being a sore winner, I propose we call it a night."

"You're not even gonna let me win it back?"

"With what?" Tom demanded "Besides, we are supposed to be at school and" he quickly looked at his watch "not only have be broken curfew, we've shattered it into itsy-bitsy pieces."

"But..." Miz looked forlorn.

"Assuming we don't get busted, we'll play again." Tom stretched "As soon as your parents send you some money... or Morrison gives you some."

Mike looked over at John, pouting.

"Hey! Do I look like your sugar daddy?" He held what chips he'd managed to save close to his chest. "Go blow one of those geeks with the camera crew... I'm sure they're getting paid more for this gig than I have left."

"How much am I cashing you out for, John-boy?" Tom asked

Morrison quickly counted his chips. "Two forty-six." He replied

"You're up a couple bucks at least." Reaching over for the money pile, he started to count off two hundred and forty six dollars for Morrison. "What's with that camera crew anyway?" He asked while counting. "They seem to be everywhere."

"It's for a season of Road Rules." Alex Riley, one of the guys who had busted out earlier in the night, replied.

"Ugh." Miz answered

"This coming from someone who auditioned for the Real World?" Alex joked "Talk about jaded."

"I'll agree with Mike. I watched a couple episodes of that show. Forcing people to do stuff for money to survive? Sounds like MTV is in the pimping business." Tom answered "Two forty-six."

Morrison quickly counted the pile of bills, mostly ones and fives. "Looks good."

"And that leaves the rest for me... seven hundred plus." Tom pocketed the money without counting it. "It's been fun boys, but I gotta get back before my roommate gets into as much trouble as I have."

"You're with Cena, right?" Morrison asked

"Yeah."

"What's he like? Seems like a real strange guy."

"I'll bring him along next time and you can find out for yourself." Tom quietly opened the door. "Later."

He tiptoed down the empty corridor. The carpet dulled the sounds of his steps enough so that he was able to get back to his room without being spotted. However, that did not save him from a lecture.

"Where the hell have you been?" Tom sat down on his bed and had just kicked off his shoes when John spoke. "I had to lie at curfew and say you were already asleep."

"Sorry, I lost track of time." Tom said, fibbing just a little. "By the way, you're invited next week... assuming your girl hasn't arrived."

"Dude, not cool. Do you know how much shit we both could still get in if anyone saw..."

"No one saw me" Tom quickly stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed. "and no one asked you to lie. I know the drill Cena, okay. You worry about your shit and I'll worry about mine."

The only sound from John's side of the room was a sigh. After that, silence.

_Same to you, buddy._ Tom closed his eyes and the motion of the ship soon had him fast asleep.

...

To Cena's surprise, Tom had already left for breakfast when he awoke.

"Maybe he's still pissed off at me." John thought, recalling the pseudo-argument while getting dressed in his usual attire of jean shorts, throwbacks, and sneakers. "Oh well, not my problem."

...

Thanks to her flirting, Brie had been able to find out what room John was staying in. She had lingered in the corridor for almost an hour and was in danger of being late for her first class. One thing the Semester at Sea had no tolerance for was lateness. To paraphrase the orientation session, which in itself paraphrased Titanic, 'this is a ship and there are only so many places you can be. So being late for class will be punished by the loss of grade points, no excuses permitted."

_Dammit, is this jock even going to class...?_

She decided to give it two minutes more... and she was happy that she did. Less than thirty seconds later, Cena stepped out of his cabin. Brie watched him lock his door, then start to head for his class. He didn't get far before the lovely young lady 'accidentally' bumped into him.

"Oh crap!" She said in mock-annoyance.

"Geez, I am so sorry." John hastily apologized "I didn't see you there."

"That's okay." Brie answered "I guess in future we should both watch where we're going." She picked up her books. John helped, which gave her the opportunity to get close to him. He smelled of soap, citrus cologne, and aftershave. Definitely a man-smell; one that she would definitely be smelling more of, if she had her way. And yes, Brie Bella usually got her way.

"I'm gonna be late so I'll see you later." It was more of a statement than a question from Cena, but his mind was telling him that he still had a girlfriend back on land even as his mouth ran forward.

"I'm sure you will."

John took off for class. Brie stood there for a moment before she also headed away, but not before she saw something gleaming on the carpet. It was Cena's room key. It had fallen from his hand during their encounter and Brie quickly palmed it.

_Nikki said this was going to tough... shows what she knows._

...

At lunch, John finally caught up with Tom. He was seated at one of the far corners of the dining salon with Morrison, Miz, Riley and couple brothers named Matt and Jeff. Seeing there was an empty seat, he went over to join them.

"...Miz thought he had me with a full house, then I show four queens and believe me that smirk disappeared." Apparently last night's poker game was the topic of conversation. "It was... hey Johnny."

"Hey Tom, can I join you?" John asked

"You guys mind?" Tom asked the rest of the table. No one objected right away, so John took that as a yes.

"I'm not sure if you've all met so John Cena, this is Alex Riley, John Morrison, Mike Mizanin..."

"Miz to my friends."

"...and he's awesome apparently, and Matt and Jeff Hardy... no relation."

"Howdy." John dove into his lunch. "Missed you this morning."

"Yeah, I had a meeting with my statistics professor." Tom replied "Didn't you get my note?"

"Note? What note?" John asked

"Oh. I guess next time I shouldn't write it in jizz on your chest." Tom replied "Anyway, when do we want to... Cena, I'm kidding."

"Oh." Cena forced a smile. "I knew that." Even though he'd already made plans to take an extra-long shower once classes were over.

"Sick burn." Morrison tagged Cena on the bicep, which lead to laughter among the boys.

"Anyway, I'm off." Tom air-balled the garbage from his lunch into the closest trash can. "I see you all later. Cena, I got a study group tonight so I won't be back until later. Cool?"

John nodded. He had a lot of homework to do, so the quiet would do him some good.

...

After dinner, a late-night workout, and a nice long shower, John plodded back to the room, anticipating at least an hour of peace, quiet, and really boring science homework. That idea was shot when he saw that his room door was ajar. He was certain that he'd locked it before he left because he could remember patting his pockets for his key and being a little anxious when he couldn't find it. That anxiety, which he'd put aside figuring that his key was at the bottom of his book bag, went up ten notches when he stepped inside.

There, on his bed, was the woman he had bumped into earlier that day. She was wearing one of John's jerseys and Cena was willing to bet that was all she had on. But what really concerned him was she had a very familiar key spinning around her index finger.

"Hi John..." she whispered sultrily, "did you lose something?"


	3. Chapter 3

"I am totally lost." Tom groused, slamming the textbook closed. "Explain to me again why we're reviewing probability charts instead of playing poker?"

"I seem to recall you be the one who wanted the study session..." Miz answered

Tom raised his eyebrows. "Oh really?"

"I think what he means is that the money from his parents won't arrive until next week." Morrison stated

"That makes more sense." Reopening the book, Tom tried to focus on the lesson even though his mind was totally boggled. Despite taking maths and business courses, there was something about this particular subject that was messing him up.

"You could always go flirt with Cena..." Miz couldn't resist adding one more stick to the fire.

Tom mouthed the words 'fuck you'.

"C'mon, Tommy... ever'one knows you got a soft spot for jocks." Miz kept prodding.

"There will be a soft spot in your head if you don't knock it off." Tom glared at his classmate. "For one thing, he's as straight as they come, he has a girlfriend..."

"That's two things." Morrison replied

"...Has a girlfriend," Tom repeated "and for that matter where the hell did you get the impression that I'm gay?"

Miz shrugged. "Never seen you with a girl, and you got that gay look about you." As soon as he'd said this, Mike knew he'd crossed a line.

"Screw you and the horse you rode in on." Tom closed the text and quickly stuffed everything into his bag.

"Where are you going?" JoMo asked

"Since Mikey seems to think there is something between me and Cena, I might as well go hang out with him. He and Gary will make a hell of a lot better company than you coupla MoFo's." Without another word Tom left, slamming the door behind him.

Morrison shrugged. "Oh well, it's his funeral."

"Yeah." Mike agreed "Who's Gary?"

...

"I don't know who you are or what you think you're gonna get away with, but it ain't gonna work. I have a girlfriend."

"Like it matters. Whatever Brie Bella wants, Brie Bella gets." She continued to twirl the room key around her slender finger. "Right now, Brie Bella wants you."

John swallowed nervously. "I'm not cheating on her."

"Who said anything about cheating?" Brie walked over and put her leg up on the bed; only a few inches from John's bare calf. To his shock, disgust, and (unfortunately for him) arousal, he could see all the way up her lightly-tanned thigh. He also realized that his first impression was correct and the jersey was the only thing she was wearing.

"W-what would you call it then?" John demanded

"Friends with benefits." Brie answered matter-of-fact.

"But I don't even like you." John replied, hoping that brutal honesty might get her out of his room.

"That's the whole point. I don't want a relationship and I guess neither do you. I just want to fuck you so hard that you won't need to jerk off for a week..."

_One week... in one week, we'll be in port and Trish will be waiting for me... _

"So what do you say, Johnny?" Brie rubbed her toes across John's bare flesh, creating a pleasant sensation that was heading directly for where it shouldn't. "Wanna come to heaven?"

Later, Cena could not even recall specifics about how he got the Bella twin out of his room without giving in to her charms. But he did. Like a quarterback rolling out of the pocket, he scooted off the bed and was quickly standing between Brie and the door.

"Get out." He ordered

"John, come on." Brie pleaded "You know you want this as much as I do."

"I said get out." John took two steps toward her. "Now."

"But..."

"Get out or I will throw you out." John grabbed her by the shoulder of the one piece of clothing she wore. "I am not fucking around here."

Brie hesitated. In hindsight, that was probably the one mistake she made. Cena twisted the strip of cloth in his hand, tightening it enough so that she would not be able to slip from his grasp. At least, not without ending up totally naked in the process.

"Don't let the door hit you on the way out." Opening the cabin door with one hand, he pushed her into the jamb.

"You'll regret this Cena, I swear." Brie hissed "No one fucks with a Bella."

"Apparently not, since you are acting like a dime-store hooker. Now give me my key and you ever try this shit again, you'll be the one regretting this." Still holding on to Brie with one hand, Cena held out his other hand.

Brie slapped the key into it hard enough to leave a mark. John winced, but quickly covered it up because he did not want to give the fuming young lady any more of his time and showing weakness like that could start the cycle all over again.

"Fine... we'll see who..." That was all Brie could utter before John pushed her further out into the corridor and quickly slammed the door in her face.

"Stupid girl." John stuffed his key into his pocket and sat down on his bed. "Stupid, stupid, stupid..."

But Brie wasn't finished. As soon as the door slammed, she went into jilted lover mode.

"You can't do this to me!" She screamed "You can't leave me this way!"

Her screams might have had more impact had their been someone else in the corridor to hear them. As it was, she was alone.

"You haven't heard the last of Brie Bella." She stomped off, still only wearing Cena's now crumpled shirt.

...

Stepping out of the elevator, Tom tossed the coffee and doughnut that he had just purchased into a trash can. He hadn't even been hungry after storming out of the study session and why he'd wasted money on them was one of those good idea/bad ideas.

"_Might as well go back and..._" This thought was interrupted when a young lady, wearing what looked like a basketball jersey and very little else, rammed into him. "What the fuck?"

"Out of my way!" She screamed, pushing past Tom and stepping into the elevator. Five seconds later, she was gone.

Something about her was familiar; Tom could swear he'd seen her face before, but at that exact moment, it wasn't coming to her. Halfway to his room, Tom stopped. It wasn't her face that he remembered, even though they had 'met' earlier, it was what she was wearing. Tom definitely knew where that jersey came from.

"Cena, you sly dog." He chuckled "I didn't think you had it in you."

...

The following day was the start of a busy week for everyone aboard. The students were starting to look forward to their first port of call and that meant that the professors were starting to assign extra reading and homework to ensure that their charges would not spend too much time having fun.

In another sick twist, some of the classes were actually having their first major tests during shore leave. Tom was one of those unfortunate souls and as luck would have it, it was the one course that was giving him difficulty: statistics.

"At least we're all in the same boat." Miz commented upon hearing this.

"You must tell me who supplies your jokes." Morrison groaned

"So he can write you some better material?" Miz laughed

"No. So I can have him shot." Morrison rolled his eyes. "All in the same boat... God, how corny can you get?"

"Is there a problem, Mr. Morrison?" Dr. Farrelly had overheard their conversation.

"No sir." John answered

"Mr. Mizanin?"

"Nope." Miz concealed a snicker with a quick cough.

"Good... let us return to our discussion of means, medians, and modes, shall we? Okay, class...quick review... can someone please differentiate between a mean, a median, and a mode as it pertains to the standard deviation?"

...

It was almost nine p.m. when Tom finally returned to his cabin. He'd stayed after to talk to Dr. Farrelly about getting some extra help before the test. He was lost and was not ashamed to admit it. The last thing he wanted to do was fail and have his parents think of him as a bigger failure than they already did.

Dr. Farrelly had tutored him personally that evening, and had promised to set him up with one of his teaching assistants for the future. A temporary solution, Tom knew, but it was the only viable one.

His brains thoroughly scrambled, Tom prepared to hit the sack early. It hadn't helped that he'd been woken much too early by the sounds of a very heated discussion outside his room. It had sounded like John was arguing with someone, and he vaguely remembered hearing a female voice. How much of that was actually and how much was a part of the very vivid dream... who knew?

"Johnny, I'm..." Tom stopped when he saw the empty room. "Okay, I guess he's still at the gym."

Tom quickly stripped down to his shorts and climbed into his berth. He fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, but it seemed that he was roused seconds later by the return of Cena.

He rolled over so he faced the bulkhead, figuring that if he appeared to be sound asleep, quiet might follow.

For the most part it did. To Tom's surprise, it seemed that John was also preparing for bed.

_Must've been one hell of a workout..._

The lights went out and all was quiet for several minutes. Tom had just about drifted back to sleep when he heard several unusual sounds from the other side of his room. At first, he thought he was dreaming, but when he heard it again, he knew that he wasn't.

"Everything all right John?" He called over

"Yeah, I'm fine." A hint or surprise in John's tone, but it was the long pause afterward, followed by what sounded like a forced yawn, that gave it away.

John Cena, the unflappably cool jock, a guy that Tom had never seen get overly emotional, was on the verge of crying. But why? Rather than ask, Tom figured that if John trusted him enough, he would tell him. If not, there was always shipboard gossip. Either way, he'd find out.

Cena was still in bed when Tom left for his classes the following day and when Tom returned, it seemed that he had spent the whole day in his quarters.

"You're not catching somethin', are ya?" Tom asked.

"I'm fine." Cena grunted before rolling over and going back to sleep.

Tom shrugged before gathering his stats text and heading off for his private lesson with the tutor Dr. Farrelly had arranged. "Okay... ttyl."

...

The same thing happened the following morning, but by the time Tom got to the cafeteria for breakfast, he'd already heard the first whispers of the rumor mill. More than one of the other students gave him an interesting look as he passed.

Tom took his usual spot with Miz, Morrison, Matt, and Jeff, all of whom broke off their conversation when he sat down.

"Don't quit on my account." Tom joked before diving into his bacon and eggs. When the chatter did not resume immediately, Tom's guard immediately rose. "Is there something I should know?"

"Like what?" Matt asked

"Like maybe why I'm getting all these weird looks... take a picture, it'll last longer." He barked at two jokers who were sitting at a nearby table.

"Imma gotta piss." Jeff hastily excused himself.

"Yeah." Matt agreed

"Oh come on. What is this? Fifth grade?" Exasperation evident in his voice, Tom set his fork down.

"Dude, it's not that. It's just... tell him, Morrie?" Miz sputtered

"Me? Why me?" Morrison asked

"Because you heard it first?" Miz replied

"Yeah, but this came from Jay and you know how much of a shit-disturber he is."

"If someone doesn't at least give me a clue as to what the hell is going on, I'll disturb a lot more than someone's shit." Tom pounded the table hard enough to make the silverware jump. "What did I do or what I am I being blamed for?"

Miz looked at Morrison, who looked at Matt, who stared at his bowl of cereal.

"Guys..." Tom said in a low voice. "I'm warning you."

Morrison swallowed nervously. "It's not you." He finally said

"It's not. Then why all the cloak and dagger shit?"

"It's your roommate." Morrison continued

"And?" Tom prompted

"This is just a rumor, and Jay said he heard it from guy who heard it from another guy, who..."

"Yadda, yadda, yadda..." Tom interrupted "Just spill it."

"Well, the gist of it is that there's words goin' round the ship that Cena was with this girl the other night..."

"That's what this is about?" Tom interjected again. "Tell me something I don't know."

"Word on the ship is that he raped her." Morrison did indeed tell Tom something he didn't know.

"Whoa! What?" Tom leaned it closer. "Repeat that."

"The way I heard it is that Cena invited this girl back to his room last night and things got a little too heated for her. She said no and tried to leave, but he wouldn't let her." Morrison explained

"Rape? Cena? You are shitting me, right?" Part of it made sense, especially if the girl in question was the one he had seen wearing John's jersey the other night, but most of it did not. He'd only known John for a short period, but rape did not seem like Cena's thing.

"I wish. He was talking to the Dean of students for hours yesterday. Rumor also has it that when we dock, he's going to be arrested."

Tom rubbed his temples.

"You okay?" Miz asked "I know you're his roommate and all, but..."

"Fuck." Tom looked down at his food, his appetite totally gone. "Great way to start the day, huh?"

"You asked." Morrison replied

"I did." Tom stated "I guess I would've found out eventually."

The ship's bell rang, letting everyone know that classes began in ten minutes. There was a scramble as students wolfed down the last of their breakfasts and gathered their books together. Within a couple minutes, the only table left was theirs.

"Shouldn't we be getting to class? Farrelly'll have a bird if we're late." Miz stated the obvious.

Tom knew that focusing on anything was going to be nearly impossible until he heard John's side of the story. If John was willing to talk, that is. "Let's go. I can barely understand the Irish bastard when he's talking in a normal voice."

...

Somehow, Tom got through his entire day. The second the last class was finished, he sprinted back to his cabin like a madman. The expression on his face was enough to get everyone, staff and students alike, out of his way.

It looked like Cena was in the process of packing up when Tom burst in. One look at the suitcases and rumor seemed to become fact in one hell of a hurry.

"What the hell, John?"

_A/N For those of you interested..._

_mean - the average value of a list of numbers_

_median - the middle value in a list of numbers_

_mode - the most frequent value in a list_

_For example, given the following list of numbers 1, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 5, 6, 6, 6, 7_

_mean is (1+1+2+3+4+5+5+6+6+6+7)/11 = 4.182_

_median is 5 (the sixth in the series of 11 numbers)_

_mode is 6 since it appears three times in the list of values._

_Pop quiz tomorrow! _  
><em>LOL!<em>


	4. Chapter 4

John didn't look up right away. Tom started to get even angrier, and despite the rape being just allegations at that point, he wanted to beat the hell out of his roommate.

"Cena! I'm talking to you!" Tom tried to get his attention for the second time, and failed for the second time. This sent his anger to a higher level; one even he had difficulty managing.

John finally raised his head to stare at Tom, but it was only for a second before he returned to looking at the floor between his sneakers.

It took every ounce of self-control that Tom possessed not to grab John and shake him. He turned and made a fist with his left hand, then pounded it into his other palm.

"What were you thinking? There are plenty of chicks, and probably a few guys, who'd willingly give it up to you. Not to mention that you supposedly have a girlfriend waiting for you." Tom exhaled through his clenched teeth. "Jesus Christ in a taxicab! Did all those protein shakes rot your brain?"

"Tommy, I..." John buried his face in his hands.

"You what?" Tom demanded "Huh, what?"

"I didn't." A very muffled voice replied.

"What do you mean you didn't?" Tom replied

"I didn't." Cena raised his eyes; finally looking Tom in the face. "I swear to God nothing happened."

"If nothing happened, then why the hell am I angry?" Tom asked

"Because you're an overbearing, overemotional jackass?" Cena shrugged

"I knew that." Tom sat down beside John. They stared at each other for several seconds without speaking; Tom's dark eyes looking directly into John's puffy red ones. "Overbearing and overemotional, huh? Correct me if I'm mistaken, but I'm not the one who looks like he went seven rounds with a bag of onions."

Cena had no quick reply, witty or otherwise. Another long moment of silence followed.

"Look, John. I'm sorry if I jumped the gun."

"Whatever, man. Everyone else on this tub has done the same thing..."

Well, forgive me for asking the obvious," Tom responded "but what are you gonna do?"

"What can I do?" John replied "She went to the Dean and I guess he believed her."

"That explained the noise." Tom nodded

"Sorry. They're kicking me off the ship when we dock in Costa Rica."

"Hmmm... could be worse. Or is it?" The look that John gave him gave Tom the impression that Cena still wasn't telling the entire story.

"I dunno. I guess it depends if the Costa Rican police are going to..."

"Just stop right there Johnny." The last thing Tom wanted to hear was anything involving nosy cops. "That ain't gonna happen."

"It isn't?" John asked "What d'you mean?"

"I mean that by the time we dock in Costa Rica, the only thing you're gonna have to worry about is not getting Trish knocked up." Tom replied "Pardon my crudity."

"I still don't understand."

"Trust me. I may be studying Math, but I'm majoring in sneakiness." Tom smiled evilly. "If you're telling me that you didn't do it, then I believe you."

"You do?" Relief shone in Cena's face.

"Yeah. If it turns out that you're playing me like a guitar, then I'll personally toss you off this boat bare-assed." Tom clapped John on the shoulders and got off his bed. "But for now..."

He rummaged through his school bag until he found an almost- blank scratch pad and a couple black pens.

"Tell me everything you can remember about the other day." Tom said, his pen poised to take down everything John said. "And don't skimp on the details. If she's lying, you gotta have your story more airtight than a submarine before people start believing you. Spill."

"I'll tell you exactly what I told the Dean. I came back to my room and she was sitting on my bed."

"How did she get in?" Tom asked

"I dunno. She got my key somehow." John shrugged

"Go on."

Cena talked deep into the night. Tom wrote down practically everything Cena said, only leaving out a few choice adjectives that John chose to describe his supposed victim.

"And she almost ran me over in the corridor right after that." Tom massaged his aching wrist. "On the surface, your story makes sense."

"It's the truth. It should." John answered

"Not what I meant, John. Sheesh..." Tom ripped his notes from the pad and put them into a file folder.

"Now what?"

"We got four days before we dock. That means we have 96 hours to find a way to blast a hole in her story so big you could drive the Queen Mary through." Tom looked thoughtful.

"Please tell me you have an idea or two?"

"I might." Tom replied "It's gonna depend on how soon I can make a call home."

...

"Brie... are you crazy?" Nikki grabbed her sister by the shoulders and started to shake her. "You actually accused him of raping you?"

"Why not?" Brie appeared unnaturally calm, despite the shaking she was receiving.

"Why not?" Nikki repeated "Have you flipped your damn lid? Do you know what will happen to you if they find out that Cena didn't do anything to you... rape or not?"

"But they won't. I'll make sure of that." Brie looked smug.

"How?"

"Don't you watch TV? They always believe the girl..."

"Yeah, but you're forgetting one thing."

"And what's that, sweet sis?"

"Evidence. Since he didn't actually touch you, much less forcefully penetrate, there's nothing that's gonna link him to you." Nikki folded her arms. "Unless you can magically create DNA out of thin air."

"Already taken care of." Brie smiled

_Uh-oh. _Nikki knew that look. It usually meant that she was about to be dragged into one of her sister's schemes. "Really?"

"Yup. But I need your help."

"I figured." Nikki answered "But this time I am putting my foot down. I am not getting involved in this. Not now. Not ever!"

"Nikki..." Brie whined

"Don't you Nikki me!" she replied "I said no!"

"It's not like I'm asking you to do anything illegal." Brie huffed "I just need you to keep John's roommate out of my hair until we get to Costa Rica."

"Hardy? What's he got to do with this?"

"Right now, as far as I know... nothing." Brie stated "But there's something about him that I just don't like. He seems to be too shrewd for his own good. History says that if Cena's gonna confide in someone it'll probably be him."

"What if he doesn't?"

"Then your job will be ten times easier and you'll probably get a couple nice dates out of it all. You've been rambling about him since this trip began." Brie answered

To her disgust, Nikki realized that she was actually starting to like her sister's idea.

"Just one problem, though. If Cena has talked to him, then he probably won't want anything to do with me."

"Be persuasive. Use those womanly charms." Brie smiled "Do what you have to do."

"Just don't scream rape, right?" Nikki added

"That might seem suspicious." Brie answered

_Why do I let her talk me into these things? _"Fine. But if things go to hell, you're burning. Not me."

"They won't. Trust me." Brie answered

_Famous last words..._

_..._

It took Tom until the next day before he could find a place shipboard that both had decent reception for his phone and was private enough that he wouldn't have to talk over hundreds of people. Not that he didn't mind a crowd, but when every second person's conversations had to do with the rape, it got really hard for him not to lose his composure.

"...it sounds like the classic 'he said/she said'."

"That's what I thought" Tom replied "and that's also why we're having this conversation."

"Normally I'd say wait until you dock and I'll meet him there, but from what I've heard we don't have that kind of time."

"Exactly. I'm not sure what might happen." Tom stated "You think you can help?"

"I don't know a whole lot about crimes committed in international waters. Give me twenty-four hours to do some research and I'll get back to you. If I can't handle it, I know someone who'll be able to."

"Cool."

"Until then, mum's the word."

"Got it." Tom said "Until tomorrow, then."

Tom ended the call and was in the process of putting it back into his pocket when he realized that he was a lot less alone now than when he'd started talking.

"What do you want?"

"It's a free ship." Nikki answered

"Not free enough for you to be listening in to other people's telephone conversations." Tom growled. "You the one who's fucking around with my buddy's freedom?"

"No." Nikki answered "I'm Nikki. That was my sister Brie."

"Oh." Tom shrugged "You still haven't answered my question... what do you want?"

"I just came out on deck for some air." Nikki answered

"Then I'll leave you to your air." Tom started to walk away.

"Look, just because your friend raped my sister, doesn't mean we have to be enemies." Nikki grabbed his arm in passing.

Tom flinched at both the touch and her obvious attempt at seduction. "Would you like an honest answer... Nikki?" He pulled his arm free. "I don't know what games your sister is playing, but I'm not getting involved in them."

"That's not what I heard." Nikki answered before her brain could stop her mouth.

"Oh, so you were listening in on my conversation." Tom glared "If there's one thing I hate more than bitches, it's lying bitches. Now get out of my way."

"I'm not in your way." Nikki crossed her arms over her bosom.

"Whatever, bitch." Tom sighed, taking her by the shoulders and gently pushing her away yet again.

"Hey! Take your hands off me!" Nikki slapped at him.

"Or what? You'll accuse me of rape?" Tom sneered "I'd love to be a fly on the wall when you explain that to whomever. It'll look real coincidental, dontcha think? The sister of a girl who is supposedly raped accuses the roommate of the rapist of doing the same damn thing." Tom chuckled "My first question would be why were you hangin' around with him in the first place?"

Nikki huffed.

"You're full of shit, just like your sister." Tom stated "Excuse me. I have homework to do."

Tom returned to his cabin, shaking his head the entire time.

_Women like that are the reason men go gay..._

...

The next morning (Saturday) dawned bright and beautiful. At least that's what the weather held outside. Inside the ship, things were not all sunshine and rainbows. After his encounter with Nikki Bella the day before, Tom was feeling a little skittish. He was one of the few people... actually, the only person on board who believed that John was the victim of a vindictive, heartless, bottom-feeding, trash bag, ho. Having her sister try to get on his good side only reinforced that feeling. However, the rest of the ship was tending to believe the previously characterized ho.

If Tom was concerned with the whispers he heard in the corridors, then he was doing a good job hiding it. He knew he might end up looking like the biggest tool in the box, but until a court said otherwise, he was going with his gut. His gut, on the other hand, was the cause of his skittishness. If one Bella was going to lie about John, what better way to make their point than to have the other one lie about something involving his number one defender?

Keeping everything together was starting to give Tom headaches and he spent many an hour draped over a railing at the back of the ship, watching the ship's wake trail behind like a couple of used party streamers.

"Hey."

Tom turned at the familiar voice. "'Sup, John?"

"Not much. Miz told me you like hangin' out here now, so I figured maybe you'd want some company?" Apart from class and meals, John rarely left the cabin, so this was a bit of a surprise.

"I ain't stoppin' ya." Tom looked out over the waves again. "But are you sure it's me who needs the company?"

John cocked his head.

"Well, since the shit hit the fan, you've been pretty much a lone wolf." Tom continued "Gary got tired of you?"

"Maybe I just wanted some human companionship?" John took a similar position to Tom on the railing.

"And if stuffed giraffes could talk, we wouldn't be having this convo, for what it's worth." Tom tried to make a joke, but even he knew that it was failing.

Both men stood in silence for a moment, the only sounds being the waves and an occasional bird flying overhead.

"Dude, I am so fuckin' scared right now." John said, his voice barely above a whisper. It was so low that Tom wasn't sure if he had heard him right.

"Don't be." Tom answered "I made my call and things are in motion."

"What things? You haven't told me anything." John gripped the railing tightly.

"I thought you said you trusted me." Tom replied, his gaze focused on the horizon.

"I do, but this is my life we're talking about!" John shouted

The change in vocal volume got Tom's attention and he turned to face Cena.

"Lower your voice!" He hissed

John swallowed nervously.

"Sorry." Tom quickly apologized "You're right. I have kept you in the dark. How about after dinner, you and I talk?"

John nodded anxiously.

"I don't have answers right now, but the least I can do is tell you where we stand." Tom returned to looking over the back rail.

"Thanks, man. If this works, I'll make it up to you. I promise." John answered

Normally Tom would have an innuendo-laced reply to a statement like that, but his attention was diverted by the sudden appearance of several members of the ship's grew. They swarmed over the aft decks, gathering up deck chairs, coiling ropes, and tightening lines.

Out of the corner of his right eye, Tom saw something that totally shocked him.

"What the hell?" He took off down the deck.

John, not seeing what Tom had seen, took off right behind him. Halfway down the port side of the ship, he found his bunk mate leaning out over the side, staring at something in the distance.

"What is that?" John asked

Tom looked over at John. Most of the colour had left his face. "I think," he swallowed loudly "that our lives just got a little more complicated."


	5. Chapter 5

If you looked over the fantail, you'd see a bright, beautiful day. No clouds in the sky, and a hint of a breeze. If you were standing on the foredeck, things looked completely different. The sky was pitch black with rows of thunderheads moving toward the boat. Every now and then, lightning flashed in front of the ship, accompanied by a thunderboom. From Tom and John's position midships, they had the best (and worst) of both worlds.

"Where did that come from?" John asked

"No idea." Tom replied "I'm not taking meteorology this term."

"Maybe we should go inside?" John responded

"Don't like storms?" Tom answered "Go ahead. I'll wait out here." He seemed to be fascinated by the crew's actions. In the span of minutes, the entire deck was cleared of all chairs and other loose items.

"What the hell I'll wait too." John shrugged

"Cool." Tom continued to watch as the crew moved on; closing all open portholes and securing them, making sure the lifeboats were safely locked into their harnesses. It was impressive to say the least.

"You think we're gonna sail right into that?" John asked. The cloud cover had begun to obscure the sunshine, giving the deck a queer mid-evening illumination.

"I dunno. Depends how big the front is."

The breeze suddenly stilled. Everything was now totally calm.

"I think we should go inside now?" His nervousness returning, John looked to the safety of the superstructure.

Tom turned his head. Before he could answer, the ship's public address system kicked in.

"This is your captain speaking. We are approaching the leading edge of a massive storm front. We are asking all passengers and crew to immediately take shelter. We do not anticipate our arrival in Costa Rica to be delayed, however passengers will not be permitted to leave the ship until the weather has broken. Repeat... all personnel are to take shelter immediately. Thank-you."

"Gentlemen, you heard the Captain. This way, please."

"So much for my tan... after you, Cena."

The duo joined the crew members heading inside.

"Look at it this way. At least we've bought you some time." Tom whispered

"How do you mean?"

"If we can't alight, then logic says people won't be allowed to board, either."

Cena's eyes seemed to brighten a little.

"I never thought of that."

"That's why I'm here." Tom elbowed Cena playfully. "Now move."

...

When the Captain had announced a massive storm front, he wasn't exaggerating. The ship pitched violently, the surf pouring over the railings. The ship wasn't the only thing rocking, however. Three-quarters of the people on board were suffering from seasickness.

"So much for the poker game." Tom said, returning to the cabin. He was one of the few who weren't face-down in the head. "Everyone else is doing the technicolor yawn."

"Erp." Cena belched. He was winning the battle against his own insides, but just barely.

"Take a gravol." Tom rooted through his bath kit and tossed a small packet of green pills toward him. "I don't want you puking all over the floor."

John dry-swallowed two of the pills and his felt his stomach calm down a little right away. "Thanks." He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth.

Tom nodded. "Just 'coz you ain't gonna puke does not mean that I'm giving you permission to pace again. It drove me crazy last time."

"Sorry. I'm just so fuckin' worried." Cena answered

"I understand, but you're not the only one involved. I got just as much on the line as you do plus I also got someone I haven't seen in a while waiting for me on the dock." Tom lay on his berth.

"I saw the ring." John stated "Engagement?"

"Sorta." Tom twiddled with it. "I was never big on symbolizing something that may or may not happen."

"What's her name?"

"Huh?"

"The maybe soon-to-be Mrs. Tom Hardy... what's her name?"

"Uh... Jason." Tom answered, flinching.

"Jason? I don't... oh."

Tom's eyes narrowed. "You gonna give me shit about it like my last roommate? If you are, tell me now."

"Dude, don't get mad. It's 2012 and I'm not judging anyone." Cena answered "Honestly, you got it working for you. I mean, and don't take this the wrong way, but you pull it off. I never would've figured you out for that, but y'know that's just not my thing."

"I got two rules in my life, Cena. Be honest to myself and don't fuck around with people I call friends. Even a muscle head like you should be able to figure out which one applies to you." Tom smiled.

John smiled, followed by what Tom perceived as a sigh of relief.

"Even if I didn't consider you a friend, you got someone... what was her name again?"

"Trish." John replied "You wanna see a picture of her?"

Tom didn't, but he said yes just to be polite. John pulled a 3X5 out of his wallet and passed it across the room.

"Wow!" Tom whistled "Let me guess... you were quarterback of the football team and she was head cheerleader?" He handed back the photo.

"Not even close... but I can see why you'd guess that." John stated "She was my tutor."

The way Cena said tutor made Tom think of a porno he'd seen back before he'd realized that chicks didn't do it for him. He inadvertently chuckled.

Cena frowned. "Sorry," Tom hastily apologized "but can you blame me?"

"I guess not." John tucked the picture away and also lay back. The only sound was the rocking of the boat and the waves crashing against the hull.

"Can I ask you something?" Cena broke the silence. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to, but..."

"Why do I get the feeling that this has something to do with the fact that I just told you I prefer penis to vag?" Tom propped himself on his elbow.

"If you're gonna play defense, then never mind." Cena retorted

"Johnny, just ask the question... don't psychoanalyze me. If it's none of your business don't worry, I'll tell you."

"How'd you know?"

"How'd you know you were into girls?" Like he usually did when someone asked how he knew, Tom replied with his own question. "Unless you're one of those who thinks it's a choice."

"I ain't here to judge. Four brothers, remember? Our house reeked of testosterone."

"The easiest way for me to explain it is there wasn't one specific instance that was a 'Eureka, I'm gay!" moment. I mean, when you were drooling over Susie Bigtits from across the street, I was also checking out her brother, but that's the way it always was for me... am I making any sense whatsoever?"

"Yeah." John nodded

"When I hit high school and the hormones took over, I was still checking out both Susie and her brother equally. Over time, Susie got pushed to the back burner and by the time grad kicked around, I was pretty sure which way I was going." Tom replied "Then Jason entered my life and there was no going back."

Hoping that one more question wasn't going to push his luck, John then asked about how Tom had met Jason.

"He was my bunk-mate during my first semester at sea." Tom stated "I was on my own for the first time, an emotional wreck, and he was there as a friend. Over time, we grew closer."

"You two ever gonna make it official?"

Tom looked down at his ring. "I think he'd like to make it permanent, but it's a logistic pain in the ass. He's Canadian."

"Don't they allow same-sex marriages up there?"

"Hell, yeah. It's the U.S. that's the problem. It would be nice if they could come to some sort of consensus."

John nodded agreement.

"What will probably end up happening is if we decide to get married, I'll just become a Canadian citizen." Tom shrugged "Right now, finishing this term is as far into the future as I want to look."

"Good luck with that." Cena replied

"Since we're being so open, can I ask you somethin'?"

John shrugged. "Whatevah."

"You ever experimented with a guy?"

John blushed.

"I'll take that as a yes." Tom stated "That's cool... you don't have to go into all the details. Y'know there was a survey that stated that two out of three men who self-identified as totally heterosexual have had a same-sex experience that led to an orgasm." He added that extra bit of information to make his question seem less pervy.

John's expression clearly showed that not only did he not believe this last bit of trivia, but anyone who tried to prove him wrong was gonna be in a world of pain.

"Like I said, I'll take the blush as a yes." Tom repeated, swinging his legs off his bunk. "Anyway, I'll be back in five; ten at most."

"Where you going?"

"There's gotta be someplace on this ship where you can receive a call in weather like this." Tom opened his own phone and swore at it. "'Coz I gotta talk to someone and I'm getting sweet fuck all for reception here."

"Don't get seasick." John joked

"I'll try." Tom stepped out the door and was immediately rocked back into the bulkhead.

_"More like head trauma if this keeps up."_

Much to Tom's irritation, there were two other people in close quarters; neither of them having the best of balance either. Normally, people didn't bother him, but when one had a video camera and the other was one of the six 'Road Rulers', Tom's fuse shortened faster than his dick after a cold swim.

"Jesus H. Christ." Tom muttered, literally throwing himself at a far wall to avoid the pair. With the exception of a brief introduction during orientation, he'd been able to avoid them like the plague. That was exactly how he wanted it to remain and God help them all if his privacy was invaded in the name of MTV ratings.

"I swear the stuff wasn't mine!" Whether he was addressing the camera, Tom, or both didn't interest Tommy in the least. He had two goals. The first was to find someone, preferably crew, who would tell him where he could make a call. The second was not to break a bone while doing it.

Eventually, and without being asked for his opinion on something by the MTV crew, Tom found a member of the crew who enlightened him with the information that there was somewhere on ship where a call could get through in weather like this. Unfortunately, it was off-limits to passengers.

"Why does that not surprise me?"

The officer shrugged and returned to his rounds. Tom looked around one last time before returning to the cabin. He had hoped to at least find someone he was on card-playing terms with and maybe set up a poker game once the storm abated. No luck with this either.

"Not my day, I guess."

"Join the club."

Tom wheeled at the voice. _"Great... what does she want?"_

"What do you want, Nikki... or is it Brie?"

"It's a free ship..." A shrug.

"Yet it's my freedom that always seems to be infringed upon." Tom reached out to brace himself when the ship took another violent lurch to port. "Look, I can't make this any simpler without reverting into baby talk, so read... my... LIPS!"

He paused for a second to take a breath.

"If you're Nikki, or Brie, or their identically dense cousin Desiree, I really don't care. Whatever you're trying to do is not, emphasis on the verb, going to work. You might as well save us all a lot of time, trouble, and a jail term for yourself... or your sister... and just admit that you lied."

The Bella in question stuck out her lower lip and pouted.

"I bid you good day." Tom pushed her away.

"You haven't seen the end of the Bella twins!"

"Trust me, I'd be the only person who hasn't." Tom punctuated this by flipping her the bird.

Her jaw dropped and she stormed off.

"That girl is like a dose of the clap, I swear."

With no good news to bear, Tom felt a little dread in returning to the cabin. But that turned to confusion at the door. He heard strange sounds from within the cabin and it sure as hell wasn't hip-hop.

"_...if you can't tell_

_I'm scared as hell _

_and I can't get you on the telephone..."_

The voice was familiar, but the words were not.

Taking a deep breath, Tom stepped inside... and what he saw shocked him.


	6. Chapter 6

"At least the captain was right. We did land in Costa Rica on time and we ain't leaving the ship any time soon."

"At least you ain't leaving the ship any time soon." John corrected Tom.

"Hey! I think I did a lot more than anyone else under the circumstances." Tom randomly punched a few buttons on his laptop. "Here." He passed Cena a flash drive.

"What's this?"

"It's a copy of everything you told me about the incident, plus a transcript of my own encounters with both Bellas." Tom answered "Make sure to give this to Mr. Park."

"Mr. Park? Joseph Park?"

"Yeah. You know my lawyer?"

"Only by rep. I know he defended that serial killer in Florida a few months ago." Cena's future suddenly seemed less bleak.

"The Tits 'N Ass killer, you mean? Yeah, that was him." Tom nodded "He's been my family's criminal lawyer as long as I can remember."

"Mr. Cena? It's time to leave." The voice of the ship's Sergeant-at-arms, followed by banging on the cabin door, quickly brought the mood back down.

John grabbed his suitcase. "If I don't see you again, thanks for everything."

Tom snorted. "This will be settled before the ship docks in Rio."

"Now, Mr. Cena."

"Keep your pants on!" Tom yelled at the door. "Just do exactly what Mr. Park tells you and I will see you in Rio."

"I hope you're right." John took a deep breath.

It took less than ten minutes for Cena to 'clear customs', be deposited upon Rican soil, and be taken into custody. Tom watched through his porthole until the handcuffs came out. That pissed him off.

...

"Attention passengers and crew. This is your Captain speaking. I have been notified that the weather has cleared sufficiently for anyone who so wishes to leave the ship..."

Tom drowned out the rest of the announcements. He'd heard them all before. He was more interested in finally getting caught up in his stats class. He was finally starting to understand the material, thanks to his tutor. A couple of hours later, he decided to take a break before his brain exploded. Best time, he figured, to see who was still on the ship and possibly set up a poker game. Slipping into his sneakers, he yanked open the cabin door and scared the crap out of the girl now standing in front of him.

"You startled me."

"Sorry, I guess." Tom shrugged "Can I help you?"

"I hope I have the right room. This is John Cena's, isn't it?"

"It was until a couple of hours ago." Tom shook his head. "Look, what's going on? Better question; who are you?"

"I'm Trish... John's girlfriend."

"Oh boy." Tom pursed his lips.

"When do you expect him back? I missed him on the dock."

"Trish... maybe you should come inside. We need to talk."

...

"Mr. Cena... this way."

After being photographed, fingerprinted, searched, and now being taken toward the holding cells, John felt completely dehumanized.

"When do I get to see my lawyer?" John demanded

"As soon as the paperwork gets filled out. It's not often we get big-shot American lawyers to our neck of the wood."

"How long will that take?"

"Dunno. Until then, here's your new home. Make yourself comfortable."

_Comfortable? He's kidding, right?_

What remained of his confidence vanished the moment the door banged closed. He sat down on the nearest empty bench, put his head in his hands, and tried not to cry.

...

"Let me make sure I'm understanding this... my boyfriend raped another girl?"

Tom had explained the situation in several different ways. One thing was for sure, quiz show material Trish was not.

"That's what she claims."

"What do you think?" Trish asked

"You've known John a lot longer than I have. I should be asking you the same question."

Trish's reply shocked and confused Tom.

"If you'd asked me that six weeks ago, I'd knock you one. But lately..."

Tom nodded. He'd heard stuff like that before.

"Maybe it was nerves." Tom suggested "He was jumping at shadows before we left port."

"Nerves I could handle. Finding naked pictures of men on his computer... how would you react?"

"Did you take to him about this?" Tom asked

"And have him know I was snooping on his computer? Yeah, right."

"Scratch that idea, eh?"

"Uh-huh. So what should I do here?"

Tom was tongue-tied. "I... uhm... well, I dunno what I can tell ya. I don't know enough about your relationship to even to suggest what you can do. I guess it would all depend upon your mind-set."

"What do you mean?"

"Do you want to keep him?"

"Well, yeah."

"Then you can't say anything about the pictures... at least not directly."

"So what the hell do I do? Stand back and hope this is just some sort of sick phase he's going through? Fuck, I lost my cherry to him!"

TMI...

"What he needs now is support; at least until this mess gets straightened out."

Trish huffed and folded her arms across her cleavage.

"After that, the ball's in your court, babe. You may have to find a way to... y'know."

"Tell him I suspect he's playing for both teams without actually telling him I suspect he's playing for both teams?"

"You said it." _Why do I get myself involved in these things?_

...

_I am not gonna cry... dammit, John... _

Cena slapped himself twice across the face, hoping that the pain would send the self-pity elsewhere. It worked for a while, then thoughts of Trish, his parents, his brothers, and how totally alone he was now sent him back down.

"John Cena?"

"Here." John shouted, wincing when his voice cracked.

"Visitor."

John exhaled slowly. It was no one he recognized, so he assumed it was his lawyer.

"Has he been arraigned, yet?"

"Later today, I think." The booking sergeant shrugged.

"Okay, that will give me time to work a few things out." Mr. Park turned to John. "I'm Joseph Park... they been treating you okay?"

"Yes, sir." John nodded

"Good. Could you leave us for a moment?"

The officer nodded, returning to his desk.

"So, John... I can call you John?"

Cena nodded again. If Park could get him out of the holding cell, John would gladly allow him to use any name he wanted.

"Okay, John. This is what's happening. You will probably be arraigned later today. I don't know exactly what the prosecutor is going to base this case on, but maybe we'll get lucky and have you out of here before nightfall."

"You mean it?" Eyes brightening at the prospect of not spending a night in a cramped cell, John finally had something to look forward to.

"I don't bullshit, Mr. Cena. Ask any of my clients."

"Sorry, sir."

"Did Tom give you something for me? He mentioned something about some notes..."

"Yeah... it's on a flash drive." John replied "But the police took it when I got here."

"No problem. At least we know where it is. If you don't mind, I'll take a look at it before the arraignment." Joseph replied

"Is there anyway you can get me out of here? Please?"

"I may be a good lawyer, but I'm not a miracle worker. You'll just have to sit tight and try not to get into any more trouble."

John was crestfallen.

"Like I said, if this works out, you'll be back on the ship by curfew." Joseph answered "I will see you at the arraignment."

...

"Those bitches!" As more of the story was relayed, Trish became less lady-like. Tom was starting to worry that his freedom with details might end up causing more problems than if he'd said nothing at all.

"Seriously?... You gotta relax. Let the law handle 'those bitches'."

"But..."

"Once the truth comes out, those two will be in more trouble than they're worth. I'm sure you'd rather be around when that happens."

Trish nodded. "What do I do until then?"

"Wait?" Tom shrugged. "You want a tour of the ship?"

...

"Listen up. When I call your name, step to the front of your cell. Almanzar, Buenos-Dias, Cena, Cucarachas, Domingues, Escobar, Guerrero, Hidalgo, Hunico, Noriega, Primo, and San Diego... arraignment in twenty minutes. The guards will be around the escort you out in fifteen minutes. Escuche. Cuándo llamar a su nombre..."

Jonh tuned out the repetition of the instructions in Spanish. He wondered if the English directions had been for his benefit only.

"Hands, amigo."

"Huh?"

"The guard waved a pair of handcuffs at him. "Procedimiento... sorry, procedure." He noticed John's expression... a mixture of confusion and terror.

While Cuffing Cena, the guard did look at him with what either be an expression of boredom or possibly sympathy.

"Amigo, I dunno what they say that you did, but I hope you beat it. You don't belong here with these _Cabrones."_

John had no idea what _Cabrones_ meant, but it was not a term of endearment judging by the guard's inflection. In line, the guard's comment seemed to make sense; Cabrones notwithstanding. His fellow accused all looked like they'd seen better days.

The brigade, was escorted into the courtroom. John immediately looked for Mr. Park and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw him chatting in Spanish with a gentleman seated to his left. John fidgeted while case after case was arraigned; the majority of them in a matter of minutes.

"Número tres siete dos cinco uno... Cena, Juan."

John perked up. He joined Mr. Park as well as the man his lawyer had been conferring with in front of the judge.

"Usted esta acusado de un cargo de volacion en premier grado. ?Como se declara?" The magistrate looked sternly at John, who swallowed nervously.

"I don't..."

"Ingles, por favor?"

"Very well." The judge sighed, motioning to the clerk to repeat what he'd said. "John Cena, you are charged with one count of rape in the first degree. How do you plead?"

The clerk's accent made his English almost as incomprehensible.

"Not guilty."

"Is counsel present?" The judge's accent was almost as bad.

"Yes, Your Honor. Joseph Park for the defendant."

"Ah, señor Park. Your reputation precedes you."

"Thank-you, Your Honor."

"Is Counsel aware of the requirement that local counsel is to be retained in cases such as these?"

"Yes, sir. For the purposes of this arraignment, I wish the record to show Aldo Montoya as co-counsel."

Señor Montoya nodded in deference.

"Prosecution on bail."

"Your honor, at this time, the defense has filed a motion to dismiss the charge due to insufficiency of evidence."

"I have received papers, señor Montoya, and I thank-you for filing in good time." The judge held up a thin stack. "I was beginning to think this was going to be a very boring afternoon. The prosecution has been given a copy?"

"We have." The A.D.A. nodded.

"Continue, señor Montoya."

"Your Honor, this case is nothing but she said. There is no physical evidence linking my client to the alleged rape, nor than even such an event occurred. The 'victim' has not even sought medical attention since the alleged attack."

"May I remind the court that the incident occurred on board a Cruise ship in international waters..."

"... which has a medical staff. You'll note that my submission included affidavits from the ship's medical staff attesting to the facts set out in our brief."

_Wow, when Tom said his lawyer was good, he wasn't kidding..._

The judge quickly scanned the documentation, then set them to the side_._

"At this stage, I am inclined to agree with Defense Counsel. I see no reason that this action should go ahead further, given the evidence before me. I am dismissing the charges without prejudice. If you can find a shred of evidence linking Mr. Cena to this, feel free to re-present later."

"Your Honor, we object. The defendant is a flight risk. His current address is a ship docked in San José, due to leave in less than a week."

"If the A.D.A. was so concerned, maybe he should've come into my court with more than heresay for a case. Defendant is released from custody. Next case..."

"That's it?" John whispered to Mr. Park.

"Yup. Thank-you for your assistance, señor Montoya."

"My pleasure, señor Park."

"I'm still a little confused." John stuttered "What just happened?"

"Basically, they had no case. For now, that is. If they can find something to link you to this, we may have to face this again. I highly doubt that."

"So what now?"

"We sign a few forms, go back to the jail and get your stuff, and get you back on the ship as soon as possible. I will suggest that you avoid contact..."

"You don't have to tell me twice, sir. I understand."

"I thought you would."

...

"That's about it. "Tom and Trish were once more in front of Tom and John's cabin. "You seen one ship, you seen them all, right?"

"Especially one that has all the fun spots converted into classrooms."

"In theory, there would be very few 'passengers' who're of legal age for 'fun'." Tom smirked

"Plus, they ban that sort of thing, don't they?"

Tom nodded wistfully. "It's a pain, but at least there are plenty of bars on shore."

"Can you get away with that?"

"As long as I don't show up to class drunk, or miss curfew, or bring contraband on the ship, there's not much they can do."

"I guess. Anyway, thanks for the tour and stuff. I'm sure you got better things to do than hang around with your roommate's girl."

"Not really." Tom thought about the homework piled on his desk and bed. "I don't got anyone waitin' for me. Not 'til Rio."

"Sucks to be you."

"Yeah." Tom opened the door. "You sure I can't offer you something? I got water, pop, Gatorade... your boyfriend..."

"Johnny?" Trish elbowed Tom out of the way and barreled into the room.

"What the... oh hi, babe."

Tom instantly read their body language. "I'm gonna try again to set up a card game. Leave a sock on the door if you don't want to be disturbed."

"Johnny, we need to talk." The moment the door closed, Trish turned on John.

"Trish, I..."

"No excuses, John. I know what's been going on?"

John raised an eyebrow. "Tom tell you?"

"Yeah, but before you go tearing him a new one, do you think I wouldn't have found out eventually? Seriously, what were you thinking?"

"But I didn't do anything. The judge dismissed the charge." John protested "Don't you believe me?"

"I really do not know what to believe anymore." Trish sat down at John's desk.

"I love you. I would never hurt you."

Trish took a deep breath. _Now or never... _"What about those pictures on your computer?"

"What are you...?"

"The nude pictures on your computer. I don't care if you're into men, I would've liked to know that before we fucked on your dad's couch, however."

"I'm not gay." John whispered

"I don't care. But if you're gonna stay with me... we've had this conversation before so you know the rest." Trish stood.

"You're leaving? Just like that!"

"You need some time, Johnny-boy. You do your thinking now and we'll talk again in Rio."

John watched her leave, his brain trying to find some words, anything, that would make her stick around for at least a little while longer. Nadda.

"Fuck!" He moaned when the door clicked behind her. He quickly rummaged through his still unpacked luggage, searching for Gary. The minute his fingers closed around his soft fur, the tears he'd held back since jail flowed freely.

"You still love me, right?"

Gary nodded.

"At least someone does."


	7. Chapter 7

"This is fuckin' ridiculous. I really gotta do something about my card playing. I'm going to need a support group if this continues." Tom mumbled "No sock... good."

The door was also unlocked, which became the second of the three surprises that Tom faced in short order. The first was the lack of a sock, and the third was the state he found Cena in. If Tom didn't know better, he'd say that it looked like John had cried himself to sleep.

"Don't jump to conclusions, Hardy." Tom reminded himself. "You know what that leads to."

Returning to the pile of books on his bed, Tom was soon mind-deep in the last of his math homework. He only knew that John was awake when he happened to look over while working out some tricky trig formulas.

"Morning."

By his reply, John was in no mood for pleasantries. "How much did she tell you?"

_Not good..._

Tom set down his pencil. "Do you really want to have this conversation now? You already look like shit, pardon the expression."

"Tom..." The hint of malice in John's voice answered that.

"About what? Your supposed bisexuality? You already told me you'd messed around a while back." Already defensive, Tom answered with two questions of his own. "Think about it. Do you really want to piss off the one guy who's had your back?"

"You sure it's just my back you want?"

Tom ignored the obvious sarcasm. "Right now, you have two things you need to figure out. How much do you love her? And, more importantly, what are you willing to do to keep her?"

"It was one of my football teammates. We got really drunk one night and I let him suck me off. Is that so wrong?"

Tom ignored the charge that went to his groin. "Does Trish know about this?"

John shook his head.

"And this is what triggered the... interest?"

This time, John nodded.

"When do you see Trish next?"

"Rio." John sighed "If I'm lucky."

"For better or worse, you bought yourself some time." Tom replied "Look man, you just gotta be honest with her. She knows about the photos already. Maybe if you told her the reason behind it... hell, the two of you might be able to find a solution that will benefit the both of you."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"C'mon now, you mean you've never talked about a threesome?"

"Not with another guy!" John exclaimed

"Of course not. What I was thinking, I dunno." Tom slapped himself in mock-annoyance.

"Would you be...?"

"No chance in hell. Sorry Johnny, but Jase 'n I are exclusive right now. At least I am. If I found out he'd been fooling around, well..."

"I understand. No offense." John responded, sounding disappointed.

"None taken. Let's just say that if I found out he was cheating on me, your pants would be around your ankles so fast your head would spin." Tom chuckled

"Dude, stop teasin'. You're turning me on." John muttered

"You started it." Tom replied

"I'll also finish if you continue getting my hopes up." From the flush in his cheeks, John was obviously having a difficult time reeling in his thoughts.

"Then I suggest you get a shower." Tom suggested

"Good idea." John grabbed his robe and quickly changed. Tom got a peek at what John had, but it wasn't like he had never seen a dick before.

"I'll be right back."

_Doubt it, but okay..._

John almost sprinted to the showers, hoping to arrive before the towel gave away too much information. The empty corridor was a blessing.

He draped the towel over the back of the door and quickly turned on the spray. The jets beat against his skin, alternately cooling him off and heating him up. For some reason, no matter how much he twiddled with the knobs, he could not get the water to a temperature he liked.

"Fuck..." He moaned, reaching for the soap. He quickly lathered up and rinsed off, allowing the water to drip down his chiseled frame. The mixture of the water trickling off his body and what had happened in the cabin sent his mind into overdrive; recalling the fateful night when he'd first allowed himself to be pleasured by another man.

That immediately re-stiffened his penis. Add to it that every time the water dripped onto his erection, it sent a shiver through his entire body and it was only seconds before John had his member in his hand and was stroking it rapidly.

"Nghhh... yeah." John moaned hoarsely, flipping between images of his football teammate sucking him off and Trish doing the same. To his surprise, the former was more often coming to mind. "Suck my cock... mmm."

John's entire body tensed as he neared his orgasm. He increased his speed, placing his hand against the wall. He closed his eyes to help him finish, but the first image in his mind shocked him. It was neither Trish nor his bud doing it to him, but it was Tom.

"Oh God..." John erupted. The cum literally exploded out of him, painting a pattern of white streaks on the stall's blue marble tile. It took Cena a few long breaths before he could say with any surety that his heart was going to stay inside his chest.

_Fuck... now I'm really fucked... Trish? Tom? What the hell is wrong with me?_

John quickly finished his showering and shampooing before his thoughts could cause him to leave in the same condition he entered. Thankfully, nothing more was said about it by either man and just as thankful was John that his dreams that night had nothing to do with sex, straight or otherwise.

...

"What the fuck?"

News of John's return to the ship quickly traveled across the grapevine. By the time John went to lunch, he was once again the main topic of conversation. Unfortunately, this means that two particular women also knew.

"That son-of-a-bitch!"

"I told you it wasn't gonna work, sis."

"I ain't done with him yet. He's gonna be mine, one way or another." Brie snorted

"After that last stunt you pulled, you'll be lucky if Snitsky wants to get with you."

"Snitsky?"

"That creepy guy with the yellow teeth who hangs out in the engine room." Nikki explained

"Ewww... nightmare."

"Only if you're lucky. The cops do frown on filing false charges, even down here."

Brie flicked her hair away from her face. "Don't worry, sis. Like I said, one way or another, Cena's going to be mine!"

...

Just under a week later, the ship left San Jose and resumed its Journey without any further problems involving either the Bellas or John Cena. Next stop: Rio de Janeiro, Brazil; 3107 nautical miles away.

On board, things also settled back into a normal class routine. John still had some snickering to deal with, but he appeared to cope.

"I really hate that guy! Fucking Irish bastard!" Tom slammed the cain door. "Fuck!"

John looked up, curiously.

"Dr. Farrelly! He scheduled my stats mid-term for the day before we leave Rio!"

"Damn, bro. Thank God I don't have him."

"You are lucky." Tom buried his face into his pillow. "I was planning to enjoy a few days with Jason, but it looks like I may have to fly him down to South Africa instead."

"That six weeks away. You're gonna be..."

"Don't say it." Tom punched his pillow, then screamed into it as well. "At least you might get some action before the Presidential elections."

"Doubt it." John moaned "By the time we settle our problems, I'll be lucky if she is still speaking to me."

"Still haven't found the right words?"

"Pfft."

"Let her talk, then. Once she's said all she wants to say, go for it."

"But what do I say to her?"

"Nothing more than necessary." Tom answered "If that."

"Thanks a lot." John threw his pillow across the room, striking Tom.

"Oh, is that how it's gonna be?" Tom grabbed a couple of pillows himself and started swinging them.

_Oh, shit... _

"Tom, I didn't mean it."

"It's too late to apologize. Mr. Cena, you are going down." Tom attacked. John defended himself just long enough to get one of the pillows away. Then it was on.

"Enough of this!" Tom tossed the other pillow aside and jumped on John, pinning him to the mattress. "Give up!"

"No way!" John squirmed "John Cena never gives up!"

"Well Tom hardy doesn't take 'no' for an answer!" Tom increased the pressure on John's wrists, but also started breathing heavily from the effort of keeping John immobile. "You ready to quit yet?"

"Okay, Tom I... NOT!"

John felt Tom briefly relax his grip, and John made him pay. Rolling to his right, Cena's momentum sent Tom to the floor, but also carried him right with. Now their positions were reversed.

A flicker of emotion deep in John's eyes was the only warning before Cena attacked Tom's mouth with a kiss. Tom relaxed, but once his brain registered, he pushed John off.

"What the fuck, man?" Tom wiped the back of his hand across his mouth "Didn't we discuss this?"

"I'm sorry Tom... I don't know what came over me." John climbed back onto his bed.

Tom glared at him.

"You're not pissed off at me, are ya?"

Tom was, but he wasn't going to say so. "John, looks like we need to have another serious conversation, okay? If we don't, we're both gonna be in a fuckload of hurt."

John nodded.

"You have a girlfriend... still. I have a boyfriend. Those are a couple of really big lines to cross."

"It won't happen again... I promise."

"I'm gonna hold you to that." Tom nodded "You pull a stunt like that again and our friendship is over.

John also nodded. Tom took that to mean he was in agreement and understood.

"Fine. We're square. Let's move on. D'you want to play poker with us tonight?"

Before John could answer, they were disturbed by an urgent knocking on the cabin door.

"You're closer, Johnny."

"Who was your slave last year?"

"No one. I had my own cabin for most of it."

"Smart ass." John went to the door.

"E-mail for Tom Hardy."

"Tom... E-mail."

"E-mail?" Tom came over and stood in the door frame next to John. "You sure?"

"Yessir. Came through five minutes ago."

"Weird. My e-mail's working fine."

"Maybe it's from Mr. Park." John suggested

"Maybe. But he has my personal account and furthermore, I doubt that he'd send anything important through such unsecure methods... but who knows? Thanks."

"Your folks?"

"Last contact I had with my folks was a court battle for my trust fund. Unless there was a massive change of heart somewhere... meh, it's probably nothing that can't wait. You wanna get some dinner?"

"Sure."

Tom tossed the email on his bed. "Let's go, then. It's nacho day."

...

"I don't know where you learned to play poker, but I am impressed." Tom whispered

John laughed aloud.

"Shhh!" Tom clamped his hand across his mouth. "We're way beyond curfew."

"Sorry." John, muffled voice and all, replied.

"You will be if we get caught. Now move!"

As quietly as possible, they crept back to their room.

"Can't wait to do that agian." John fell onto his bed, sounding like he'd either recently finished a marathon or had sex.

"I'm sure you can't. " Tom kicked off his shoes. "I'm not so sure about Morrison and Miz. I clean 'em out one week and the dude I bring the next week does the same."

"Is it their fault we're so good." John pulled off his jersey, then stripped down to his jockey shorts.

"Nah, they just suck like a five dollar hooker." Tom likewise made himself ready for bed.

"And you would know that how?" John joked

"Experience. Once we make land in some of the poorer nations of the world where women will engage in acts of hem-hem-hem for a potato, you'll see what I mean." Tom took a quick look at the still unread e-mail, then decided he was too tired. "Remind me to read this tomorrow."

"Sure, bro." John and his giraffe snuggled into the warm berth. "When we land in Rio, I'm takin' you out."

"John, I thought we agreed..."

"No, no, no, man, not like that. I meant as a thank-you for everything." John quickly clarified what he'd said before it caused another argument.

"John, save your cash. You don't need to..."

"For once would you let someone do something nice for you?" John retorted "If it wasn't for you, I'd probably doing that hem-hem-hem against my will in a Costa Rican jail right now."

"At least you'd... never mind. If it'll make you feel better, then we'll go out one night in Rio."

"Awesome!" John exclaimed

"Right now, we should try to get at least a couple of hours of z's." Tom stared at the luminescent dial on his watch. "We can't show up for class looking like we'd stayed up all night."

"Agreed. 'Night Tommy 'n thanks again."

Tom was already out. Five minutes later, so was John.

...

"Sis, I still don't get it. Why'd you send that e-mail to Tom? Do you really think he'll believe it?"

"It doesn't matter if he believes it or not. By the time he figures it out, he'll have learned that no one interferes in my life and gets away with it." Brie folded her arms.

"If you say so." Nikki wasn't so sure. Deep down, she had a bad feeling about it. A real bad feeling.


	8. Chapter 8

Several days went by with no change. The e-mail remained unopened on Tom's desk mostly because the owner was too busy juggling school commitments to worry about it. (Real reason: he'd forgotten about it.)

The twins from hell, well…

"Maybe I didn't word the dump letter strong enough." Brie was becoming angrier with each day that passed.

"Maybe he talked to his boyfriend and quickly realized that it was a lie." Nikki answered "I'm pretty sure he has a cell phone."

"One way to be sure."

"What now? Break into his room?"

Brie huffed. "Yeah, right."

"You mean you've finally come to your senses?"

"I don't have to. I have a duplicate key." Brie showed her sister the copy that was attached to her necklace. "Tell someone you've lost your key and bam… another one."

Nikki rolled her eyes. "I don't believe you."

"Believe it, sis. Now I need you to do me a favor."

"No chance in hell!" Nikki shouted loud for a few heads to turn. She blushed, and then went on in a quieter tone of voice. "There is nothing in this for me. You want to get into John's jorts, then do… IT… YOURSELF!"

"Fine, I will. But if you get in my way, then I'll hang you out to dry… and then I'll hang you from the mast."

"Do your worst, sis. I'm not afraid of you anymore." Nikki smirked "Later."

Brie's face turned an interesting shade of fire-engine red.

"Careful Brie, don't want your head to explode." To put the last nail in the coffin, Nikki walked over and had a 30-second conversation with Tom. Once she'd finished whispering in his ear, the turned back to Brie, winked, and then walked away. In the corridor, she took a huge gasp of air.

"That is the last time I help you…"

…

"'Rik, can I ask you a question?"

Tom immediately wished he'd brought his iPod. "Whatever it is, the answer is either no, no chance in hell, or go fuck yourself. The choice is up t'you." He added a smile that was dangerously sweet.

"I was just curious if there was a way to send or receive e-mail other than the computer lounge? You've been around longer than most of the scabs here."

"Talk to admin. They might be able to help. It all depends on what you're… sending."

"Thanks." Nikki returned the smile. If the pause was any indication, she had just reminded Tom of the e-mail. Either way, she was now officially through with her sister… she hoped.

ONE DAY OUT OF RIO…

John was having a wild dream. He was on the beach, wrestling with another man. I was hot, sweaty, and they were both naked. It was very much alike to some late-night movies John had watched on HBO, only there were no floppy breasts anywhere. Two hard sets of pecs grappled for dominance… there was sand, there was friction, and it was in Technicolor. It was every gay male's ultimate fantasy.

In his dream, John climaxed hard. He saw spots and screamed his orgasm through. He looked at the (dream) guy and realized it was Tom… and then realized he'd screamed himself awake.

"Y'okay?"

"Did I wake you up?"

"Yeah." Tom yawned

"Sorry." John replied, ignoring the pressure in his groin. He was positive that if he looked under the covers, he'd see a wet spot on his boxers. He rolled onto his side and grimaced when he felt something sticky between his legs.

"You sure you're okay?" Tom raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, man. It was just… uhm… vivid."

"No worries. If I'd been dealing with some of the shit that the bitch-twins had put you through, I might be screamin' myself awake more than once." Tom stated "Go back to sleep. We dock tomorrow."

John turned to face the wall and was fast asleep in moments. Tom chuckled while he snuggled into the mattress.

_Definitely vivid… I just wish the dude would stop dreaming about me._

"This is your Dean of Students speaking. Just a reminder to all faculty and students that your S.A.S. identification is required before returning shipboard. We will dock in roughly four hours. Anyone wishing to go ashore should be aware that just because you are in a foreign country, it does not mean you should act like it. There were issues in Costa Rica that I do not want repeats of. That is all."

"Yeah, Cena!"

"Shove it Brooks before I pour booze down your throat." John shouted back.

"Chill, man. He didn't mean you… the Dean, I mean. Apparently those "Road Rules" people got a little too rowdy while doing one of their 'missions'." Jeff answered

"I heard there was alcohol found in one of their rooms." JoMo added

"Have they starting searching rooms?" John asked, horrified that someone other than he and Tom would find out about Gary.

"No, but when you have camera guys and producers hoverin' 24-7, there's no room to hide." Morrison said over a mouthful of sandwich.

"I'd hate to be one of them and need to jerk off." Jeff said, the sucked the pimento out of an olive. The loud smacking noise sent the table laughing. "Probably have to use the shower."

"No prob about it." Matt stated "I walked in on one of them."

"Awkward." The entire table chanted.

"At least now I know I don't have the smallest dick on the ship." Matt replied

"What's this about you having the smallest dick on the ship?" Unusually late, Tom took the closest empty spot. "Shove over, Mizanin."

"Where have you been?" Miz squeezed over to let the bigger man sit down.

"Arguing with Doctor Farrelly."

"How did that go?"

"Guess. Since the book doesn't say anything about tests, Farrelly's got one over." Tom shrugged "Really fucks my plans, but what can you do?"

"Did you talk to the Dean of Students?"

"Really, Jeff? Really? I'm sure that's the first thing Tom would've done." Miz interjected

"Didn't have to." Tom took a gulp of soda, and then wiped his mouth with the back of his forearm. "Someone else in my class complained 'coz there were gonna miss the lecture from the Brazilian president."

"Even that didn't help? I'm surprised."

"Apparently, Doctor F is doing that in all his classes, so I guess it's gonna slide through, Presidential lecture or no Presidential lecture." Tom sighed "Hopefully Jase will understand… remind me to ask him what was in that e-mail."

"Sure." Cena shrugged "You positive it's from him?"

"No, but he's the only one who'd send it through the ship." Tom mimicked John's shrug.

Two tables away, Brie bit her lip.

_He's gonna get it… one way or another._

…

-RIO-

The last day of classes was a sham. The students were way too excited to concentrate and most of the teachers were counting the hours until they could have five days away from those same students.

Most of the teachers, that is.

"And just a reminder to ye that the test is 'ere on Thursday at ten in the mornin'. Chapters four through eight…"

"Buzzkill." Tom muttered softly.

"Somethin' ta add, Mister Hardy?"

"Not really, sir. We've already discussed this." The last thing Tom wanted was a scene.

"Good. I'm sure ya don't wanna on-ship detention for the next week."

"It really doesn't matter to me, but I'm sure you don't want to be stuck watching over me instead of relaxing in Rio. The beaches, Carnivale, et cetera et cetera." Tom winked at the student seated beside him.

"Point taken Mister Hardy. Class dismissed."

Was Dr. Farrelly actually smiling?

…

The weather was perfect for the time of year. By the time the ship docked, almost everyone was on-deck, standing two- and three-deep in many places. John, Tom, and the rest of their clique had bagged spots near the bow. They scanned the crowd waiting for the ship, waving and pointing when one of them spotted a friend or relative.

"You see her yet?" Tom had to shout just so John would hear him.

"No. I hope she came." John answered, not turning from anxiously scanning the crowd.

"I don't see Jase either." Tom stated

"Did you ever read the e-mail? Maybe somethin' came up?"

"You were supposed to remind me BEFORE we landed… there he is!" Tom shouted, waving like a madman.

"Who's the hot guy standing next to him? Looks hot." John elbowed Tom in the ribs.

"Which one?" Tom squinted

"Tallish, dark hair, leather jacket, Pink Floyd shirt…"

"Holy shit! That's Joel! My Fuckin' kid brother." Tom squee'd "I haven't seen him in years! What the hell is he doing here?"

"Looks a bit old to be your 'kid brother'." John was overflowing with wit this fine day.

"He's three years younger than me, okay! How 'bout you find your own people instead of raggin' on mine?" Tom stuck his own elbow deep into John's rib cage.

"There's my folks!" John exclaimed a moment later. "But… where's Trish?"

"Running late, I hope." Tom shrugged "C'mon before we have to elbow the underclassmen out of the way."

"Race all o' ya!" JoMo called over.

"You turn everything into a competition." Matt stated

"Ten bucks says he's like that in bed." Tom added, and then took off in pursuit.

"Yeah, first one to come loses." John said to himself, and then also started running. He caught up to Tom and Morrison seconds later.

They ran down the boarding ramp helter-skelter and were soon in the arms of family, girlfriends, and/or boyfriends.

"Where's Trish?" John asked once his mom had finished fussing over him.

"She had a family emergency." John Sr. stated. "She sends her love."

John's face fell.

"Ceeena!" Tom, his entourage close, pushed through the crowd.

"Tommy! You found your folks, ah see."

"Just makin' sure you did the same." Tom stated

"Are you the one who's been keeping our son out of trouble?" John's mom asked

"It's a twenty-four/seven job, but I try, ma'am." Tom didn't know how much John's parents knew about his adventures in Costa Rica, so he said nothing more about it.

"I told you he'd make friends, dear." John Sr. looked at his wife.

"I wasn't worried."

"Then why'd you insist on packing that damn giraffe?"

John covered his face. "Mawm! Daaad! You're embarrassing me!"

Tom and his brother shared a look. "That's part of their job. Enjoy it while you can."

John just tried to hide his embarrassment further.

"We gotta run, man. We're having dinner at the Aprazivel later, if you and your parents would like to join us." Tom offered

"Actually, we have made other plans." John's father stated.

"We have?" His wife questioned. "That's news to me."

"Just 'coz we're married, it doesn't mean I have to tell you everything." John Sr. replied "Right son?"

"Whatevah you say, pop."

"Some other time, then." Tom shrugged. "Enjoy your evening with your folks and it was a pleasure to meet both of you."

…

After a nice dinner and a show with his parents, John returned to the ship. Unfortunately, his folks had to fly out on the red-eye back to Boston that night, but they promised that they would meet the ship in South Africa. They also promised a longer stay, but John knew that could change fifty times between now and then. He laid down on his bed and just managed to get comfortable before he heard footsteps running down the corridor and stopping outside the door. He heard a key being fiddled with and moments later, the stateroom door was thrown back hard enough to bounce off the wall.

Tom stormed into the room. His body language was plain enough for anyone to read.

"Mother fucker! God damn it! Piece of shit! I was so fucking stupid!" Tom looked at his side of the room for literally two seconds before he started to rip it apart. Clothes, schoolbooks, pillows, Lizard… everything not bolted down went flying.

"Lose something?" John asked, although he probably should've kept quiet.

"Where is that fucking e-mail?" Tom almost shouted. "Fuck, fuck FUCK!"

Not finding what he needed on either his bed or in his closet, Tom turned to his desk. In seconds, the room looked like the floor of the New York Stock Market during a busy day of trading.

"Here it is!" Tom ripped open the envelope and quickly read the single sheet of paper that was inside. His expression went from one of anger to one of pure fury. The paper was quickly crumpled up; Tom, a moment later.

"Fuck." He said softly "I knew it."

"Y'okay?" John asked, although he already knew the answer.

"Not really." Tom sighed "I just fucked myself." He stopped and took a huge breath of air. "Big time."


	9. Chapter 9

Cena put a cautious hand on Tom's shoulder. He looked back at John, the fury in his eyes still obvious. John quickly removed his hand in case Tom decided to focus his wrath on the nearest object: himself.

"Once I find out for sure that those twins were behind this, both of them are taking a nosedive off the fantail."

"After what they did to me, I'll be the first one to help ya… aw, Tom…"

The anger had finally broken Tom. His hands were into fists, but tears were streaming down his face. He was trying not to lose it completely.

"Yo' dawg, things'll be a'right." John knew that he was not the best person to act as a crying towel. In times like this, he automatically slipped into what people who knew him called his "Marky Mark" mode. "Ya know, if ya boy is gonna flip on ya that quickly, it might be a sign that things ain't what theah meant to be. Ya know what I mean?"

Tom nodded between sniffles.

"Just move on, man. Ya got me, ya got ya crew… ya got..."

"A mid-term coming up in three days." Tom exhaled deeply and loudly. "But thanks anyway."

"It was nuthin; man."

"Most people would've left me alone to deal with it." Tom rubbed his eyes. They were still red, but at least they were dry. "I owe ya one."

"Dude, ya helped me out in Costa Rica. We're even." John replied, despite his brain sending him messages of the 'ask for head' variety.

"I still owe ya. Next time you need to jerk off, let me know. I"ll do it for you." Tom stared at the mess he'd made. "Now I get to spend the rest of my night cleaning all this shit up."

He grabbed the nearest pile of random debris from the floor, leaving John where he was. Cena wanted to offer to help him out, but a part of him wouldn't allow him to move. Just the offer of a future handjob had a serious effect on him. He felt like there was a rod of iron pressed against his leg.

John pulled at the leg of his shorts while Tom's back was turned, hoping to relive some of the pressure. Seeing Tom's ass when he bent over to pick up some papers from the floor made things worse instead of better.

His brain was receiving more urgent messages from his cock, ranging from "Stop moving." to "If Tom sees that I want attention, maybe I'll get it now instead of later."

John half-sighed, half-moaned. He really hated when his hormones took over and his brain started taking orders from his dick.

"You doin' laundry this week?" Tom suddenly asked

"Tomorrow." John stated "I need to wash some stuff before I run out of boxers, socks, 'n shit."

"Then I guess I won't jack you off while you're dressed." Tom raised his left eyebrow in a gesture than was becoming very familiar to John. He climbed off his bed to gather his pillows. To make his point, when he leaned over John to put them back in place, he squeezed the branch extending halfway down his leg.

"N-now?" John gulped

"Why not? You look like you're fiendin' for it." Tom smirked "Lean ya ass back."

If John's brain was still the organ in charge, he might've hesitated for longer than two seconds. It wasn't. He immediately lay back; his back pressed against the bulkhead.

Tom wasted no time removing John's shorts and underwear. Tom had once told John that Jason used to joke that by the time he knew he wanted head, Tom had already sucked him dry.

"Pretty fly for a white guy…"

"Uh…"

"Never mind." Tom spat into his palm, then grabbed John tightly. When he moved up, the spit made it feel as tight and as wet as the last time he'd fucked Trish's pussy.

John scrunched his eyes closed. He was afraid that if he actually watched his cock being pumped, he'd finish before he got to do what he wanted.

That got John's brain working again. How far would he be willing to go with Tom? Handjobs were one thing, but would he or could he go further?

No matter what he thought, between both his heads, he was done. Finished. Use whatever slang term you want here. Cena groaned and Tom's fist became slick at the same time. Tom continued to pull his roommate until John needed to remove Tom's hand from his cock.

"Wow!" John stared at the mess on his chest and abs.

Tom cleaned his hand on a random piece of laundry.

"Since my plans have been fucked right the hell up, I'm gonna see if any of the gang are around for a poker game… you in?"

"Uh, sure." John continued to stare at himself. "I'll be there."

"Cool. See ya later."

Like nothing had happened, Tom left. John quickly looked for something to clean up before he started to stick to himself. He grabbed an old pair of gym shorts that were heading for the laundry and wiped off. While doing this, he reflected about what had just happened. He had done something that he hadn't thought about since early high school. It was erotic, but dirty and a learning experience at the same time. Cena had only used his precum for lube. What Tom had done was much hotter and way more satisfying.

_I can't wait to try that myself._

"Why wait?"

John looked down. His dick pointed toward his face.

_Go on. I'm ready if you are._

John lay down on his own bed this time. Ten blissfully hot minutes later, another pair of gym shorts was getting dirty.

"Wow!"

…

The ship left Rio on schedule. Four days into the Rio-to Capetown, South Africa leg of their semester at sea, John finally asked Tom what he had in mind when he said he planned to fuck with the twins from hell.

"Don't worry, bro." Tom smiled, giving Cena's neck a friendly squeeze.

"This is your captain. Just a reminder to all passengers and crew that there will be a mandatory lifeboat drill at 16 00 hours. All passengers and crew are instructed to report to their designated lifeboat stations at the time. That is all."

"Didn't we do this already?"

Tom and John both turned.

"You two are like fuckin' explosive diarrhea." Tom glared at the two girls.

"At least there's medication for that." John added

The girls sniffed and walked aft.

…

"If you see someone fall overboard, you shout 'man overboard!'"

"What if it's a woman?"

Tom smirked… _Oh man… the setup!_

"That is a good question. Does anyone know what you shout if it is a woman?"

"Full speed ahead!"

"Full speed ahead." The officer repeated "Close." He waited for the laughter to stop before he continued. "It's still man overboard, I'm sorry to say."

The rest of the drill went along without any more comedic moments. That didn't stop John from repeating the joke to everyone he knew. After the third re-telling, Tom made a lame excuse and snuck off to the ship's library where he remained, studying, until curfew.

John had already drifted off to sleep by the time Tom returned. He fucked around on his computer for a while, trying to find the right words to put into an e-mail to send to Jason. After writing half-a-dozen versions of "I'm sorry. Can we try again?" and hating every one, he gave up and went to bed, crying himself to sleep for the fifth straight night.

…

"I don't know how much longer I'm gonna be able to deal with those two." Cena said over lunch the following day. "I can't do anywhere on the ship without either or both getting in my space."

"Wasn't Tom gonna do somethin'?" Morrison asked

"He was, but he's been so to himself since Rio. I don't wanna add my shit to his." John responded wearily.

"One more scoop won't matter." Miz added smugly.

John sighed. He wasn't in the mood to argue with Miz. He wished that Mike had found someone else to ride. Not that Mike was a bad guy, but he was not what Cena needed now.

Jeff bounded in; he was unusually late for lunch. "Heya." He sang

"Where you been? You almost missed mac and cheese day."

"Meh." Jeff skipped to his chair. "Tommers stopped me in the hall. Said he was running way late and asked me if I'd give this to Johnny. I think it's a love letter."

Cena spit muscle milk down the front of his shirt. "What the fuck? Jeff!" He dabbed at the spots with his napkin, but the material had absorbed the liquid before he could do much more than blot at it.

Jeff giggled. "Hee hee… oops!"

Cena mumbled some choice words under his breath, and then left the table to change. He read the letter from Tom while he switched the soiled jersey for a clean one. He smirked.

"When you said mindfuck, you weren't kidding."

…

At the stern, Tom leaned against the railing. Facing the superstructure, he second-guessed himself for trusting Jeff. What he should've done was deliver the letter in person, but a dashing student named Cody had caught his eye on the way to the cafeteria. Nothing had happened, but it was nice to look around now that he was, at least in his own mind, single.

He looked at his watch for the fourth time in five minutes. If Cena did not arrive soon, part one would have to be scrapped in favor of a more drastic approach. Eventually, he saw two almost-identical shapes approach from the starboard side of the ship and one larger shape from port.

"Cena!" Tom hissed, hoping the pair wouldn't hear him. "Get over here!"

"I'm here. What do I do?"

"Shut up and follow the script." Tom demanded "Make it good, if you want this to work."

…

"Now that I taught that Hardy queer a lesson, I promise you John will be mine." Brie snickered

"Now." Tom whispered, appearing to force a kiss on John. Playing the role, John forced a break two seconds before the Bellas came into frame.

"Sorry dude, I like you as a friend, but I'm not into you that way."

"Yeah." Brie couldn't believe her 'luck'. "He's mine!" Brie pushed between John and Tom and kissed Cena.

What happened next shocked everyone not in on the plan, basically the Bella twins. As soon as Brie's lips touched John's, he pulled away so quickly that Brie went face-first into the railing, then ass-first to the deck.

"Apparently my roommate isn't into you that way, either." Tom shrugged.

"Y-you can't touch me like that!" Brie yelled. Nikki tried to help her sister, but Brie swatted her hands aside.

"What ya gonna do? Accuse me of rape again?" Cena's neck was turning red. He didn't need to fake his anger this time.

Brie gave John a look that said the thought was already crossing her mind.

"We'll do you one better." Tom stated "Let's go."

It did not register until after the boys were out of sight that she'd been set-up.

"Bastards!"

John and Tom both heard her, as probably also the entire ship.

"Now what's the rest of the plan, yo?"

"This has to fucking stop."

From his tone, John knew that Tom was reaching the end of his own rope with the twins.

"So what are you gonna do?"

Tom expression was completely serious. "There's only one thing I can do. I'm gonna throw them both overboard and hope that someone has the decency to shout full speed ahead."

"What?"

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

"Are you serious, man?"

"Tomorrow, you're talking to the Dean of Students."

…

To John's surprise, he was taken seriously by the Dean. Even more surprising was that evening's announcement that the following afternoon's classes were cancelled and a mandatory talk on sexual harassment would be held. He also promised a full investigation which could lead to expulsion.

"If expulsion is warranted, it would not occur until we land in South Africa." Dean Ambrose cautioned "A word of warning. Regardless of what happens, do not do anything to encourage, incite, or enrage the young woman."

"No sweat, sir." It was already more than John had expected. "Thank-you."

"That's what we're here for. You should've come to us as soon as we settled the trouble in Costa Rica. For the record, I didn't think you'd done anything, but it was out of my hands."

As John left the Dean's office, he heard the Dean instruct someone to get the Bells twins into his office not now but yesterday. He smiled wished he could be a fly on the wall for that conversation.

…

The only thing Cena remembered about the sexual harassment lecture was leaving the auditorium with a big cheesy grin on his face and a pool of cum in his underwear. Thanks to a dark room, a whispered suggestion from Tom, and John's ability to orgasm quietly when necessary, this 'friends with benefits' deal was really starting to appeal to John. He did wonder what was gonna happen when Tom asked for something in return. John quickly pushed that thought into the 'later' file.

Aside from the conflicting messages passing from his brain and his groin, John seemed to have everything under control. Tom's relationship with Jason was hanging. His e-mail of apology had finally been sent after only 13 attempts. The reply had come almost immediately, but it was not what he'd wanted. Two words: 'talk later'. That was it.

Trying to do his make-up stats assignment, he could literally see how close to his own point of no return he was. The pounding behind his eyes wasn't helping.

"Cena?" Tom twitched at how raw his voice was. "John?"

"'Sup, man?"

"If I snap you off a branch or two in the next week, don't take it personally. 'Kay, dude?"

"I don't getcha." John's density picked a terrible time to reappear.

Tom looked at the pencil in his hand and for one moment wanted to stick it into his eye socket. "I'm at my limit with this shit. The more I think about it, the more I really want to throw the twins from hell overboard." He sighed

John echoed the noise. 'I haven't heard anything about their expulsion."

"It's not the kind of thing they would announce." Tom stared at the pencil one more time. "Fuck!" He screamed and threw the writing implement across the room; hard enough for it to stick into the wall.

"Wow!" John mouthed, crossing over to pull the pencil out. It left a neat hole between Christian Bale's eyes.

"You're not gonna go all American Psycho on me?"

"Not on you." Tom smiled, but he knew it was forced.

"Cool. Here's your pencil." John patted Tom's back. "Fuck, man!"

"What?"

"You're really tense."

"Thanks, mister obvious." Tom turned back to his assignment. "You would be too if…"

"Want a rubdown?"

"Not really. I'm fine."

"A hole in the wall is not fine. Let me help you…"

"John, it's not that I don't appreciate what you're trying to do."

"Dude, just shut up and let me do something for you for once."

Tom smirked. "Oh really? Finally takin' charge, are ya?"

"Damn straight. Take ya shirt off and lay down." John cracked his knuckles.

"Yes, boss." Definite sarcasm in his voice, Tom pulled his dress shirt over his head. "Don't break me."

Cena chuckled. "Don't worry, man. I've done this before."

"I won't ask." Tom stretched out on his bed.

Cena grabbed a bottle of muscle relaxant from his gym bag. He dripped a line down the middle of Tom's wide back.

Tom yelped "You keep that shit in the deep freeze? Fuck man, that's cold!"

"Don't be suck a pussy."

"Well, meow!" Tom adjusted himself and rested his head against his wrists.

John climbed on top of Tom and started to work the unguent into Tom's shoulder and neck. "Relax, mofo, I said I wasn't gonna hurt ya."

"This is new to me, okay. I've never been the receiver."

"Well, get used to it." John rubbed his shoulder blades, working deep into the muscles.

"Just keep it above the waistline, sunshine." Tom shifted and felt a pop in his neck.

"It's working already."

Tom hated to admit that John was right. Fifteen minutes later, he felt close to normal.

"Okay Johnny you were right… for once."

Cena leaned forward. "Get used to that too." He whispered in Tom's ear, then kissed his cheek.

Tom turned his head and returned the peck. "You always bone when you're giving a massage?"

John turned red. "What… how did?"

"I wasn't the only one breathing heavily." Tom stated with a hint of a giggle. "Now, can I please roll over before you start dry humping me?"

"Sorry." John answered "I don't know what it is. You're the only dude who's ever gotten to me like this."

"I wish I knew as well." Tom answered "Then I could find you a nice girl on the ship to help you get over me because I am sick of jerking you off."

"Not the first time I've been dumped." Cena said, saddened that Tom would feel that way.

"Who's dumping you?" Tom half-closed his eyes. That was his way of saying that he was confused.

"But you just said…"

"I know what I said, bro. I was there." Tom leered, looking down at the stretched fabric of Cena's shorts. "I had other ideas."

John gulped. "Like what?"

"I have this problem." Tom rolled his neck. "If I don't give a hot guy a blowjob at least once a month, I get rusty."

Cena's pants tightened even further.

"I thought so." John cracked his own knuckles, then unzipped John's shorts. He reached in and pulled John's dick free.

_Hopefully he lasts longer than that freshman in the library…_

Tom slid down the bed until the head of John's penis was at lip-level. It wasn't overly muscled like the rest of John and just wide enough to give his mouth a meal without choking him if John was a thruster. He flicked his tongue across the tip and John moaned at the touch.

"Damn, you are sensitive down there." Tom smiled "I thought it was just my smooth hands… I know, shut up and suck."

He put the head into his mouth and with the perfect amount of suction, took every inch of John on the first time. When he reached the base of his cock, neatly shaven, he wiggled his eyebrows and hummed loudly.

Cena gasped. Not even Trish could make his balls churn like Tom. This was better than any of the sex of his young life, and there had been a lot of it.

Tom kept up the intense sucking. John was twitching on top of him, obviously enjoying this.

"Oh fuck…" John groaned "Dude, you should teach a class on head. Girls…"

"Shush and enjoy it." Tom squeezed John's sack while speaking. "Talk later."

He went back to pleasuring Cena and Cena returned to his peak. Tom watched John's breathing and synchronized his head movements with that. As Cena started to pant, Tom sucked faster. He felt the change in John's dick.

"Dude…" John leaned forward, bracing his hands on either side of Tom's head.

Tom nodded. He'd been with enough men to know what Cena was gonna ask.

John felt the orgasm build. It wouldn't take much more… two suck-strokes… three… four… that was it.

Unlike in the auditorium, John released with a shout. Spurt after spurt of spunk shot into Tom's mouth. Tom devoured most of it, a dribble escaping his lips and trickling down onto the pillow.

Cena drew out slowly, his spent cock still red and throbbing.

"If that's how you pay for a massage, then I'll give you one when you need one. That was awesome!" He put his rod away. "You ever gonna let me pleasure you?"

Under other circumstances, the question might be funny.

"Until you decide whom you want to make a commitment to, then no." Tom stated

John was confused… nothing new there.

"I know that look." Tom answered "Let me explain. You still have a girlfriend and unless Jayce comes around I'm single."

"You want him back?"

"Irrelevant. Jayce and I had an arrangement, although those bitches fucked that up."

John was still baffled.

"This was supposed to be a test to see if we wanted to make it official." Tom patted the mattress. "Sort of our Rumspringa."

"Mmm…" John attempted to sound like things made sense. They didn't.

"Our last bit of freedom. What he did while I was at sea was his business. Just like you 'n me are my business. When we land in Los Angeles, we were gonna either propose to each other or go our separate ways." Tom explained "The greatest relationship test."

"Beats the fuck out of Temptation Island." John jibed

"Or The Bachelor." Tom added

"Could you honestly see 'em doin' a gay series of that?" John asked

"I dunno. That Juan Pablo seemed like he'd take pipe up the ass." Tom answered "But don't tell me…"

"Internet, man." Cena replied "Can't spend all my time studyin'."

"Your hetero quotient is dropping faster than Miz's bank account." Tom snickered

"Or my pants when you're in the mood." John added "But seriously dude, are you ever gonna tell me what your plan is?"

Tom sneered "Probably not."

"Aww, dude…"

"John, drop it." Tom sounded annoyed "You'd know what I'd love right now?"

"A blowjob?" John was totally ready to suck Tom. He wanted to, but he was not gonna force himself on his friend. But he was praying that Tom would say "Sure."

"I would love to have a copy of everything that was said at the meeting with Ambrose and things one and two. I'll bet you my poker winnings the lecture is only the beginning."

…

4 a.m.

The ship, except for the low rumble of the engines, was completely silent. It moved across the ocean with a stealthy quiet like a giant anaconda stalking prey. The bridge lights were its eyes in the blackness. The serenity shattered exactly two minutes later when shrillness pierced the night air.

"What the f…" John sat up. All across the ship, others had the same reaction. Cena padded to the door and stuck his head into the hall.

"Time to get up already?"

"Beats the hell outta me." John answered, yawning noisily into his hand.

"It's not the muster alarm."

"No duh, Sandow."

John watched three of the ship's officers go by, accompanied by security. All had worried looks on their faces.

"Hey Tom, you oughtta see… this…" The last word stuck in his throat. Tom's bunk was empty, except for Lizard who didn't seem concerned about anything.

Cena quickly got his watch from the night table. The dial showed that it was seven minutes after four in the morning. For a long moment, Cena though this was a very vivid dream. Yes, that's exactly what it is, John told himself. You're dreaming and you're gonna wake up in three hours and go to breakfast and this will all just be a memory.

Between the alarm, the commotion in the hall, and having his sleep so very rudely interrupted, John's brain shut down totally. He looked across the room one more time, then went back and lay down. He pulled the heavy blanket across his wide shoulders and closed his eyes.

It was after eight o'clock when he woke again. The first thing he realized what that the ship had stopped. When or why was somewhere in the fog of his sleep-addled mind. A fog that tried to convince him that he had dreamed the four a.m. wake up call.

Three sharp knocks added to his befuddlement. John padded to the door. Two steps to go, the knock sounded again.

"Keep yer shorts on, I'm comin'." Cena muttered "Meh?"

It was a junior crewman. "Sorry to disturb you, but Captain's orders."

"Huh?"

"Are all cabin residents accounted for?"

Five seconds passed between the asking of the question and John being able to understand it. English for the sleep deprived was not on his curriculum for the term.

"Yeah; I mean, no." John shook his head violently side to side.

"Yeah; I mean, no." The sailor repeated deadpan. "Which is it?"

"My roommate Tom Hardy. His bunk is empty."

"Ok." A quick scratch on the clipboard by the sailor and he moved on.

"What's goin' on?"

John thought he'd only asked himself until he got an answer from the man with the clipboard.

"Not for sure, but it seems like someone went overboard last night."


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note:  Thanks goes out to Redsandman99 for help with the end of this chapter. If you don't know who she is, or haven't read any of her work... then what is wrong with you?**

Going through four classes, plus lunch, was torture. Every time he overheard a passing comment about the alarm, John became more and more certain that his best friend (John couldn't use the word 'lover' as long as Trish was around.) on this trip was gone.

"It's a big ship, man." Matt tried to console him at lunch. "Maybe Tommy fell asleep in one of the lounges or an empty room."

It didn't help. Even so, John was too much of a nice guy to say so. Instead, he nodded and returned to his food. He also skipped his usual after-class workout… he was of no mind to sweat. He just needed to be alone. In his room, he wasn't. To his shock, amazement, and relief, Tom had returned.

"Tommy?! Wha' happened to you?"

Tom looked over, a very weak smile on his face. That was when John realized that his friend looked like shit.

"Food poisoning." Tom sighed, his forehead wet with a line of perspiration. "I was puking most of the night."

"Uck. I hate puking." John nodded

"I must've passed out. One second I'm doing the porcelain tango and the next thing I remember is being in the infirmary getting IV fluids pumped into me." Tom smiled again, and then closed his eyes.

John watched his for a moment. Tom was lying, he was almost positive. But why? John couldn't finish the thought and frankly, he didn't want to.

…

Tom spent the next three days in bed. Either he was really sick or one hell of a good actor. When he finally went back to class, no one questioned his story. John still had his doubts. Cena remembered dinner on that night and it was shepherd's pie. He also remembered having two huge portions of it. If something had been wrong with the meat, the John figured he should've been twice as sick.

But maybe Tom was right or maybe it was a mild allergic reaction or maybe… _No!_

John bit his lower lip, hating himself. After the intimacies they'd shared over the past weeks, just the thought that Tom was deliberately hiding something was making both his head and his stomach hurt. He fell asleep the moment his head hit the pillow that night.

Across the room, Tom opened his eyes. He watched Cena's chest rise and fall for a good five minutes before he was satisfied that John was out for the night. He crept out of the room, closing the door as quietly as possible before he slipped into his sneakers and vanished down the corridor.

"This time, watch the fuckin' clock." He muttered softly. "Money says John won't buy another excuse and the "food poisoning" already cost you three days." His journey took him deep into the ship, into an area normally off-limits to students. He worked as long as he could, with one eye on the clock and one eye out for anyone finding him. Screwing up either way would probably get him kicked off the ship.

Fortunately, he did remember to watch his time and made it back to bed before anyone came to check on him.

…

The following evening brought a festive air to the ship. It was the last day before making land in Capetown and everyone was relaxing. Even Dr. Farrelly had relaxed and there were no tests scheduled. But the rumor mill was still working; flowing faster than the bilge pumps about the general alarm of several days earlier. Everything from a bomb to man overboard passed among the students and staff. When it was finally officially explained as a mere short-circuit, the reaction was less of relief and more of annoyance.

"If that was it, why'd they wait so damn long to tell us?" That was the general reply, cleaned up for virgin ears. That discussion soon turned to the more pleasant topic of their next layover. It was the longest stop of the trip; a whole two-and-a-half weeks to immerse oneself in the culture of South Africa.

Miz and Morrison were sketching out plans for a card game. Not just any card game, though: 72 hours of straight poker. This was all done in low voices since the table to the left was occupied by the MTV crew. They were having a "frank" discussion about South African history; particularly Apartheid. John kept one ear on them and the other on his own table. To him, any conversation that involved the "Road Rules" crew seemed scripted and he'd had a couple of them.

"…joining?"

"Huh?" John snapped back to his own table.

"Can we count you in?"

"I d'no. I don't think I c'n stay awake that long." John shrugged

Morrison rolled his eyes. "We don't expect anyone to. It's come and go when you want."

John shrugged again. "I'll see. I got plans."

Jeff whistled. "Sounds like someone's gonna get some."

John rubbed his temples.

"Leave it to you to turn something nice into something smutty." Adam smirked "Typical Jeffrey."

Jeff stuck his tongue out and blew a raspberry.

"Real mature." Matt smirked "Count me in. Amy isn't meeting me this time."

"Awww… poor Matty." Jeff taunted "Just you and…"

"Finish that sentence and you're taking a swim fully clothed." Matt threatened him. "Don't think I won't."

"How's Tom doing?" Jay changed the subject again.

"Sleeps a lot." John replied, his mouth full. He swallowed, and then continued. "He says it was food poisoning, but I dunno."

"I'll agree with you there, Johnny-boy. I think the medical staff was trained by Dr. Seuss."

"Glad to see yer up. Matty 'n me were gonna start planning yer funeral." Jeff smirked again.

"You're just full of wit today." Matt frowned

"Or something that rhymes with it." Miz muttered "Feelin' better, I assume?"

Tom sighed. "More like I am not going to be stuck on this ship for two-plus weeks while everyone else gets to have fun."

"I hear ya." John was counting down the time to some fun with Trish.

Miz brought up the subject of the three-day poker game again.

"Sounds like fun. If we're back from the walking tour of Capetown, I'll clean y'all out again."

"We?" Morrison chuckled "Since when do you have a social life outside of this table?"

"Since I met a kid who knows the area." Tom answered

"You mean Justin?"

"Yeah." Tom grabbed an empty chair. "Nice guy, seems to know his stuff."

" 'N he's hot." Jeff giggled

"I hadn't noticed."

Just then, Justin walked by. "We still on?"

"As far as I know." Tom stated

Watching how at ease Tom and Justin were with each other, John felt something… was it actually jealousy? No f'in way, he reasoned. He was still into girls (the hand and blowjob aside), and had a girlfriend who he was going to see tomorrow. But then why was he feeling the way he did about Tom spending some time with Justin? Even if he was totally hot and, if Miz was right, swung off both sides of the plate?

Cena frowned. _This is not good._

…

Less than three hours out of Capetown, the alarm went off again. This ship stopped dead for the second time in three days, sending all students to their rooms for a head count. This time it was one of the twins from hell was not among those present.

"If the alarm continues to fuck up, we might be docking longer in Capetown." Tom mused

"Or not dock at all, but I wouldn't mind." Cena peeked over his copy of Health and Fitness. "Where the hell do you go every night? You got some booty call you don't want me to know about?"

Tom looked over. He was ready to spin a story, but he stopped.

"Out of respect for our friendship, I ain't gonna lie to ya, but you gotta keep it quiet." Tom set his pen down.

"The plan?"

Tom nodded.

"That's cool." John immediately dropped the subject.

A furious banging on the cabin door jolted them.

"Get that Johnny? You're closer."

"Who was your frickin' slave last year?" John joked, but answered the door anyway. It was Adam, out of breath.

"'Sup?"

"Word's hit the fan. Brie Bella went overboard."

Cena's jaw hit the floor. Behind him, Tom chuckled. _No great loss._

…

This was turning into a very eventful last semester at sea for Tom. Cena's arrest in Costa Rica, the issues with Jason, and now this. The official word came down from the grapevine that yes, one of the twins from hell was no longer on the ship. But if she was just hiding somewhere, the ship had already been searched once and plans had been made to go over it again while the students were on shore .

All the drama aside, there was the sex. This was not the first time Tom had found a lover on board, but it was the most satisfying. He smirked, remembering the look on Cena's face when he came.

He capped his pen. Beside him, Cena slept soundly. Their arrival had been delayed by one day, and most were using the time wisely or in John's case, to catch up on the rest he hadn't received the previous nights. Tom re-read the last few lines in his journal before putting the book away and getting back into his own bed. He dozed until the ship's horn announced their arrival in Capetown, South Africa.

"I hope you and Trish get shit straightened out." Those were Tom's parting words to Cena before he and Justin headed out on their walking tour.

"Aight." John answered "You back tonight?"

Tom grinned. "Don't worry. I've made plans. See ya at the poker game."

…

The day started out beautifully for John and Trish. They walked through Capetown, stopped at Two Oceans Aquarium and Table Mountain, then took a ferry to Robben Island and saw where Nelson Mandela had been incarcerated for all the many years. It was during dinner at an outdoor café where things got intense.

"Johnny, I don't want to ruin the rest of our time here, but we really need to sit down and talk some things over."

Cena nodded. He was expecting this, but a little surprised at how soon it happened. "Sure, babe. But not here."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want our love life becoming a part of a TV show." John glared at the MTV-ers who were nearby; apparently excited about the idea of living with South African families. "It's bad enough just having them in two of my classes."

"Where do you suggest we talk then?"

"Tom won't be back until at least tomorrow. My room?"

"I'd rather not." Trish huffed. "If you really want to talk in private, let's rent a room for the night."

Cena nodded. "Okay." He was all too happy to agree with that, though not necessarily for the reasons she was thinking. They did actually have things they needed to talk about. He knew that. But there was a sinking feeling in his stomach that there was just no way talking was going to end well. No, if he could let some actions do the talking instead it would be better. He could fix them that way. Or that's what he told himself anyway.

...

The hotel room they ended up in was like any standard one they could have gone to back in the States. Two queen size beds with a TV across from them, a table by the window, a little counter to keep the ice bucket and the coffee maker and a bathroom stocked with tiny soaps and shampoos. Cena wondered for a moment if he should have tried to find a nicer place but then decided it didn't really matter. The place had a bed and it didn't look like it was infested with anything gross, which made it good enough for him.

To her credit, Trish was actually looking to talk. She tried to speak the moment he had the door closed but he didn't let her get far. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her before she got more than a syllable out of her mouth. Her eyes widened in surprise. Her hands went to his chest and there was a brief moment where she tried to push him away. It wasn't a long-lasting one. She gave in, her arms going around his neck. In that moment it felt like nothing had changed. They were the way they were before the cruise. Before Tom. Tom, who was out somewhere with Justin right now. The jealousy he had denied before reared its ugly head. There were a lot of things Tom could have been doing with Justin this entire time. Things just like this. Things he could have been doing with Tom right now instead.

No. Damn it no. He had to stop thinking like this. He was into girls. He was into Trish. He tried to remember that fact. Their clothes were rapidly falling to the floor and her soft, dainty hands were all over him. One hand wrapped around his cock and started to stroke slowly. His body should have immediately responded. There was one time it would have been. But now he just stayed limp in her grasp. As hard as he tried to deny it, this wasn't the hand he wanted to touch him. Her handjobs were now nothing compared to Tom's.

"John?" His lack of a hard on was not going unnoticed by Trish. "What the hell?"

"Keep going." He wrapped his hand over hers and helped her jerk him off. The feeling of his hand at least allowed his mind to pretend it was Tom's instead and much better results were had. Sure it was weird thinking about a guy while he was with his girl but it sure beat not getting it up at all.

Trish moved back to the bed, laying back with her legs spread. Her eyes were watching his every move carefully. He elected to pretend he didn't notice. He snagged a condom out of his wallet and put it on before going over to the bed. He settled himself between her legs and pushed inside her slowly. His mind was still fixated on Tom. In his mind it was Tom who was under him. His nails digging into his back. Or maybe he would be the one laying on the bed, getting pounded and fucked through a mattress. Either sounded good to him quite frankly. He put his face in her neck, his imagination really running away from him now. Her scent was Tom's now. Her voice was Tom's. It was all Tom and he should have known to watch himself better than he was. But the closer he got to cumming the less control he had. And as he felt himself start to go, a single word escaping his lips.

"Tom!"

"WHAT?"

Cena froze. _Oh fuck_. He just fucked up. He just fucked up royally.


End file.
